THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1994, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: TUESDAY, June 21, 1994 TAG: 9406210057
SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E1 EDITION: FINAL
SOURCE: BY ELIZABETH SIMPSON, STAFF WRITER
DATELINE: 940621 LENGTH: Long
Not so fast.
{REST} Just because a movie was made for children doesn't mean you should drop your kids off at the theater without looking back.
Disney's newest release, ``The Lion King,'' for instance, has a scene in which the lion cub discovers his father lying dead at the bottom of a cliff. Ahh, yes, shades of Bambi.
Fortunately there's enough humor and good spirit in the film to overpower the teary parts, but prepare yourselves to impart some comforting words and answer those tough life-and-death questions children may ask.
Most important in facing movies with death scenes is to not let your child - especially the preschool set - face the screen alone. ``Exposure to that kind of scene should always be with an adult who can explain what has happened,'' said Dr. Michael Lewis, director of the Institute for the Study of Child Development at the University of Medicine and Dentistry of New Jersey.
Reassure the child that death is a disturbing event, and that it's OK to feel sad. Most children may leave it at that; others may ask for more information about death.
``Give the child the facts,'' Lewis advises. ``Life is made up of being born, growing old and dying. Whether you want to explain it in religious, poetic or biological terms is the preference of the parent.''
Keep it simple and age-appropriate. And follow the lead of your child. If they want to discuss it, encourage that, but don't force children into mortality discussions in between mouthfuls of popcorn.
A short discussion before the movie can help allay concerns during the disturbing scenes, and a follow-up conversation on the ride home can put to rest any lingering thoughts.
``Parents have to be psychologists themselves,'' Lewis said. ``Observe your child and ask whether they have any questions about the movie.''
Whatever the movie, parents should always be watchful of their children to make sure they're not traumatized by spooky scenes or such issues as death and violence. What may seem harmless to an adult can move a child to tears.
Consider the age of your children and how sensitive they are to frightening scenes when deciding whether to go. Glenn G. Sparks, associate professor of communication at Purdue University in Indiana, said children who are 3 to 5 years old can't distinguish very well between what is real and what is fantasy. And it really doesn't help for parents to harp on the subject because children that age aren't old enough to grasp the concept.
A key variable for that age range is how things appear. ``If something looks ugly or there's a character who's grotesque, a child is likely to be frightened by that,'' said Sparks, who has studied the emotional responses of children and adults to frightening movies. ``They are very focused on how things looks.''
For instance, the monstrous looking star of ``The Beauty and The Beast'' may turn out to be a nice guy in the end, but a 3-year-old may never get past the sheer ugliness of the guy. The grumpy neighbor shooting his rifle in ``The Fox and the Hound'' might seem like a pretty mild form of violence but can still cause alarm in young children.
Although some child development experts advocate confronting scary images and conquering fears, Sparks believes children should not be exposed to movies that genuinely frighten them in an overwhelming way. If a child is covering their eyes, crying and telling the parent they don't want to watch, that should signal the parent to leave the theater or turn off the video.
``I don't see any reason to put a child through that,'' Sparks said.
By the time a child is about 6 or 7, she is better able to understand the difference between what's real and what's fantasy. Animated films become less frightening but real-life movies have more power to disturb a child.
At this age, however, a parent is better able to explain different issues that are disturbing to a child. Just letting a child talk about issues that come up in a movie helps them seem less scary or disturbing.
``Even if you don't have any great answer it's important to let them know you are there to talk about it,'' Sparks said.
Karla West of Suffolk said tha simply saying, ``It's just a movie,'' helps her two children, Rachel, 8, and Ryan, 6, get through scary scenes of movies, and encourages them to talk about what's bothering them.
Sometimes children will initiate the conversation themselves.
Four-year-old Chelsea Panissidi of Franklin carefully watched her aunt when the fox's mother died in ``The Fox and the Hound.''
``Are you sad?'' she asked her.
The aunt said no.
``Well, you're gonna be,'' said Chelsea, who had seen the movie before.
Her mother, Dorothy Panissidi, said she tries to let her daughter know it's OK when the characters cry, that it's OK to be sad sometimes. ``Death is a hard concept to explain to her. I just try my best, and try to make it simple.''
The three things that tend to most disturb children in movies are spooky scenes, the death of a character and violence, such as shooting. The younger the child, the harder it is for them to verbalize their fears, and the less likely their coping skills are developed.
To keep children from being unnecessarily frightened, parents should find out as much as they can about the movie beforehand. Don't assume that just because it's Disney it's going to be innocuous. Read the reviews and talk with other parents. Does the movie deal with death? Are there scary scenes with monsters or ugly characters? Is there violence of any sort?
If your child is sensitive to such subjects or is easily scared, take a conservative line and don't go. If you have some question whether the movie is appropriate or not, wait until it comes out on video. You'll have more control in your living room than in the movie theater. Not only will you be able to talk more easily about issues in your living room, but you can turn off the video if you think your children shouldn't watch any more.
If you do decide to let your children go to a movie, go with them. The presence of a parent best comforts a child. You can also gauge what's frightening to a child. ``Encourage the child to verbalize what bothers them,'' Sparks said.
by CNB