THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1994, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Tuesday, August 30, 1994 TAG: 9408300009
SECTION: FRONT PAGE: A14 EDITION: FINAL
TYPE: Opinion
SOURCE: By JON KLEIN
LENGTH: Medium: 86 lines
``Why did you become pregnant?'' I asked Kathy, a 15-year-old lesbian. She had just shown a picture of her son to gay, lesbian and bisexual youth attending a support group in Richmond.
I assumed Kathy (not her real name) was going to say her pregnancy resulted from a desperate attempt to ``change'' her sexual orientation. In fact, two lesbian teens had given this answer months earlier. Kathy, however, had a different story. ``I came out to the wrong people in school,'' she said, ``and one of them raped me after telling his friends he could make me straight.''
Unfortunately, I've heard many disturbing stories at the support group. Carla was disowned by her father, who referred to her as ``the scum of the Earth,'' after she came out to him as a lesbian. Pat dropped out of high school because ``it was a living hell'' of anti-gay harassment. Martin tried to kill himself back in eighth grade ``when everybody hated me'' - and when he hated himself - for being gay.
These stories of family rejection, school failure and suicide attempts are not isolated cases. In 1992, the National Network of Runaway and Youth Services reported that up to 500,000 lesbian/gay youth are forced from their homes annually because of conflicts over their sexual orientation. The medical journal Pediatrics reported that 28 percent of youth who are harassed in school because of their sexual orientation eventually drop out, and a recent Penn State University study found that 42 percent of lesbian/gay youth had attempted suicide.
The Penn State study blames the routine harassment and abuse of lesbian/gay youth for their high suicide rate. A 1989 federal government report on youth suicide concurs, ``The root of the problem . . . is a society that discriminates against and stigmatizes homosexuals while failing to recognize that a substantial number of its youth has a gay or lesbian orientation.''
The stigma and discrimination exist largely due to ignorance about homosexuality. One common myth is that homosexuality can be chosen or acquired during adolescence, yet sexual orientation is deeply ingrained before children even begin kindergarten. Dr. Jack Weinberg; former president of the American Psychiatric Association, notes that ``. . . fears of `catching' homosexuality, or being `recruited' at school or elsewhere are utterly without scientific foundation.'' To those who believe teens choose their sexuality, one must ask why anyone would purposely enter a situation where s/he is likely to be isolated, rejected, vilified and discriminated against.
The related myth that homosexuality can be ``promoted'' prevents lesbian/gay youth from receiving support routinely given to other minorities. High-school students might be taught that famous writers James Baldwin, Samuel Delaney, Lorraine Hansberry, Lanston Hughes and Audre Lorde are African-American. Providing them as role models can enhance the self-esteem of African-American youth, and helps others appreciate the contributions of African-Americans. Yet students are not likely to learn that these same five writers are also gay.
Discrimination contributes to a lack of role models by discouraging lesbian/gay adults from being visible. Although lesbian/gay teachers, for example, work in virtually all Virginia schools, most hide their sexuality. Despite the risks, it is important for more lesbian/gay adults to come out, especially those who work with youth. The example of even one openly gay adult can shatter stereotypes and inspire lesbian/gay teens to overcome feelings of shame, isolation and fears of a bleak future.
Low self-esteem and feelings of hopelessness contribute to high rates of suicide, substance abuse and AIDS. Jim, a gay male who became HIV-positive at 16, knew how to protect himself, but told me, ``I was feeling so bad about myself back then that I did a lot of self-destructive things.'' Lesbian/gay youth risk assault if they hold hands, go to proms or engage in the same dating behaviors considered appropriate for heterosexuals.
In this second decade of AIDS, it is imperative for gay youth to be encouraged to develop healthy, monogamous relationships. It is equally important for them to develop the positive self-image which make responsible sexual practices more likely.
Jim, Kathy and Pat are all doing much better than they were a year or two ago. Carla and Martin have blossomed into two of the finest young people I've ever met. Unfortunately, I know several lesbian/gay youth who, unable to find support and encouragement, killed themselves before their 20th birthday. I look forward to the day when lesbian/gay youth are valued and provided the same acceptance as their heterosexual peers. MEMO: Mr. Klein is founder and executive director of the Richmond Organization
for Sexual Minority Youth, which provides support services for gay,
lesbian and bisexual youth ages 14 to 21.
by CNB