The Virginian-Pilot
                             THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT 
              Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: Saturday, January 7, 1995              TAG: 9501070232
SECTION: FRONT                    PAGE: A1   EDITION: FINAL 
SOURCE: BY DENISE WATSON, STAFF WRITER 
                                             LENGTH: Long  :  140 lines

BUILDING A BRIDGE ACROSS THE ABORTION CHASM

Twice this week, when John C. Salvi III came before a judge, the courtyard of Norfolk's General District Court became a silent battle ground.

Women carrying ``Stop Abortion Now'' signs avoided the gazes of women wearing lapel buttons stamped with coat hangers and the words, ``Keep Abortion Safe and Legal.''

Their physical distance was no more than a few feet; their emotional distance stretched miles.

B.J. Isaacson-Jones of St. Louis doesn't have to watch CNN to understand. The co-founder of St. Louis Common Ground Association saw the same rift cut through Missouri when pro-choice and anti-abortion debate escalated six years ago.

But now Isaacson-Jones, a former director of a clinic that provides abortions, and Andrew Puzder, a lawyer and then one of Missouri's staunchest pro-lifers, have built a bridge through their Common Ground group.

While maintaining their distinctly different views on abortion, they have been invited into communities split by the issue to get good people on both sides to embrace common interests for the common good.

``We use conversations to bring these groups together in a nonadversarial setting. These aren't little summits between Planned Parenthood and the local Right-to-Life organization; these people come together as humans,'' said Mary Jacksteit, a Common Ground mediator from Washington.

``We bring them together for conversation. These aren't debateson abortion; it's not a place to try to persuade the other side to change their views or come to any compromise. This gives them a chance to understand each other. . . They often realize abortion is the only thing they disagree on. They realize they have many of the same concerns in regards to teenage pregnancy and other health issues for women and children.''

The Common Ground concept is simple - bring the two groups together, follow rules that mandate that listening and respect are essential and understanding is the goal.

Isaacson-Jones explained in a telephone interview how Common Ground formed in St. Louis:

``Andy wrote an op-ed piece in the newspaper challenging pro-life and pro-choice people to ease the pain of people living in poverty. When I read the piece, it occurred to me that he might be searching for common humanity.

``For 20 years of an ugly, nasty struggle over abortion, neither side has been successful in reducing the number or need of abortion. We thought we could pull our passions together and reduce the number of abortions. Not debate abortions.''

At the time Isaacson-Jones and Puzder got together, other groups around the country were forming. Search for Common Ground of Washington, D.C., which specialized in international mediation, began working with a Buffalo coalition. Then the St. Louis group, along with organizations in Wisconsin and elsewhere, joined under the Common Ground banner.

Co-directors Mary Jacksteit, a lawyer, and Adriene Kaufmann, a Benedictine nun, fly around the country at the request of pro-life and pro-choice groups that decide they need a reprieve from the heat of the abortion debate. Jacksteit and Kaufmann work as mediators, concentrating on the basic good and basic desire for peace they believe exists in all people.

Isaacson-Jones and Puzder had the same belief, so they met despite protests from their respective sides.

``My colleagues said I was not being very smart,'' said Puzder, who now lives in Newport Beach, Calif., but returns often to St. Louis to work with Common Ground.

``They said the liberal media is just going to take this to disparage the pro-life movement.''

When the Missouri group was still an idea, Isaacson-Jones invited Puzder to a meeting at her clinic.

Puzder agreed to an after-hours visit. ``I just couldn't be there while they were performing abortions,'' he said.

The two clicked within minutes.

``After the first 10 minutes, we discovered we had enough common ground to keep us together for the rest of our lives,'' Isaacson-Jones said.

``We both believe in self-esteem, we believe that abstinence is the best policy for teens, we both had strong feelings about adoption and how it can be a wonderful choice for some women.''

In the four years since its inception, the St. Louis Common Ground group has supported Missouri's expansion of the Women, Infants and Children program that gives financial assistance to needy families. Isaacson-Jones and Puzder worked together to promote adoption with Isaacson-Jones adding an adoption agency to her clinic.

When a bill to help crack-addicted mothers was stalled in the Missouri legislature, Isaacson-Jones and Puzder lobbied both sides for passage of the Crack Baby Bill.

``We are never going to resolve the abortion debate; we are on fundamentally different sides of the issue. . . I don't know if it should be resolved,'' Isaacson-Jones said.

``But there's a lot of things both sides can do to reduce the number of abortions.''

There are now eight Common Ground groups around the country, all concentrating on the abortion issue. Besides St. Louis, Buffalo, N.Y., and the Washington areas, others are in Denver, Milwaukee, San Francisco, Pensacola, Fla., and Cleveland.

Jacksteit and Kaufmann receive requests from interested groups and then help them set up the community conversations. The groups involved designate a neutral spot for the conversation site and develop rules for the discussion. With the volatility of emotions surrounding the abortion issue, Jacksteit says the groups sometimes find it necessary to regulate the language that will be used during the conversation.

``If this group wants to be called pro-life, they'll be called pro-life,'' Jacksteit said.

``If it's pro-choice, they're called pro-choice. . . the group in Wisconsin agreed they were not going to use language that they know will be upsetting or provocative; they understand the way they use their language will have an effect on how the conversation will work.''

The conversation must have a balance of people from both sides. It begins with participants filling out questionnaires dealing with abortion, spirituality and equality. They fill out a second, responding the way they think the opposing side would answer.

The group breaks into smaller units that allow people to talk about what they feel is necessary, how they arrived at their views on abortion, how they are troubled by the way they're portrayed by the media.

The groups later reconvene to review the results of the questionnaires.

``They are often surprised by the results. For example, there's a question on the importance of spirituality; often pro-life people predict there will be a very low score among pro-choice people, but it's usually the opposite,'' Jacksteit said.

``Same thing with people who are pro-choice and questions of women's equality. This helps them see where they agree and where they've been totally wrong.''

Some local activists have mixed feelings about Common Ground.

``I'd like to see one in action before I would think about participating,'' said a Chesapeake woman who referred to herself as a ``staunch pro-lifer.''

``That just seems too simple to work.''

Debra Tint of Norfolk, who said she wants to become more active in pro-choice activities following last Saturday's shooting at the Hillcrest building, said she'd be willing to try.

``I can see how it can work. I think if we were to sit down and agree to disagree on this, we'd probably have a lot in common.''

Because the network is nonprofit, Jacksteit said it doesn't charge a fee, but usually needs an invitation and financial support for traveling expenses.

A trip to the Hampton Roads area would be relatively cheap, she said.

``All I have to do is get a call and I'd jump in my car.''

KEYWORDS: PRO-CHOICE PRO-LIFE ABORTION ANTI-ABORTION PROFILE

COMMON GROUND MEDIATOR MEDIATION CONVERSATION by CNB