Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: SATURDAY, March 17, 1990 TAG: 9003192498
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: E1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: Ben Beagle
DATELINE: LENGTH: Medium
I suspect that the warm, calm weather is giving them a fairly bad time.
As you know, the Waltons often depend on bad weather to supply their crises - which they always meet head-on and solve as a family.
It has been that way ever since the first Walton TV show when Pa Walton was feared lost in a blizzard on Christmas Eve, but made his way back to the warm bosom of his family.
Oh, sure, they have gotten into crises in good weather, but they do their best when it's lousy outside.
As we look in on Nelson County's greatest family, Ma Walton is in the kitchen.
You can tell immediately that something is wrong.
She does not have flour on her hands or on her cheek, and there is no evidence that she has begun to prepare the usual seven-course meal.
"Why, what's the matter, Olivia?" asks Grandma Walton. "You look lost in thought."
"I don't know what it is," Ma Walton says. "I guess it's just that we haven't had a family crisis in such a long time. You can't really have a crisis in weather like this.
"Before John-Boy left home to become a foreign correspondent, we had plenty of crises. That child could stir up a blizzard in a hurry."
"There's liable to be a family crisis if we don't get our usual seven-course meal," says Grandpa Walton, who has been sunning himself in a turn-of-the-century bathing suit.
"Knock it off, you old goat," Grandma Walton says. "Go get drunk and fall down and hurt yourself. We need some kind of crisis to bring us together."
"The brakes on my personal touring car are bad," Grandpa says. "Will that do?"
"For heaven's sake, no." Grandma Walton says. "We got five cars."
"Woe unto ye who covet material things, for thee shall suffer the baleful glances of thy children whose teeth will be put on edge," says Grandpa. He has taken Grandma's advice and started in on the sauce.
All of the younger Waltons are sitting on the porch listlessly. They do that when there is no crisis, during which they can show how gentle, yet brave, and strong, yet loving, they are.
Grandpa, going upstairs to change his bathing suit, falls down the steps.
"Well," Grandma says, "this here is a crisis of some kind, I reckon."
"I suppose so," says Ma Walton. "But it would be much better if we could have a nice blizzard while we're driving him to the hospital in Charlottesville."
by CNB