Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: TUESDAY, March 20, 1990 TAG: 9003202305
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: E-1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: Ben Beagle
DATELINE: LENGTH: Medium
Great. Now, there you are falling off the Interstate 81 bridge over the New River, which is suddenly on fire as far downstream as Radford.
You wake up screaming just a little and go back to sleep so that you can get in there and restructure this sucker.
In this new dream, you are falling off one of the bridges over the New River on Interstate 77. Only this time, you have managed your nightmare to the extent that the river is not on fire.
This may be some improvement. But I am a coward, and I would never go back to any dream in which I was falling off a bridge into a flaming river.
It just looks like a no-win situation to me, if the expert will pardon me.
Besides, I am not very good at going back into the same dream - even a very good one.
Let us say - not caring what Sigmund Freud might have thought - that this dream has me on a tropical island.
Contrary to what some of you might think, I am fully clothed and lying under what appears to be a palm tree. Yeah. That is one of those drinks with an umbrella in it in my hand.
Somebody is playing "Sweet Lelani" on a ukulele, and - get this, Sigmund - Kim Basinger and Sigourney Weaver are giving me a pedicure.
We all know what Dr. Freud would have made of this dream. Pedicure? Right. Foot fetish.
The girls and I have just agreed to really get it on for the weekend - maybe go somewhere to dance the lambada all night - when I wake up smiling.
You think I could get back in there and manage that dream through a night of tropical splendor? No way.
My grandmother, who was not very familiar with Dr. Freud, always said your dream would come true if you told it before breakfast.
If I really should have this Basinger-Weaver-pedicure dream, I won't even start the coffee before I give you a ring.
But for now, I'll continue to have the dream in which I run around in a pair of boxer shorts that have pictures of these little lambs on them.
I do wish to become salacious here, but if a person went back and tried to get this dream changed, he might end up in real trouble.
With my luck, for example, I'd fool around with this dream and end up running around with nothing on my body.
Hey, you want a nightmare? You got a nightmare.
by CNB