
                         Roanoke Times
                 Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: MONDAY, April 9, 1990                   TAG: 9004090261
SECTION: EDITORIAL                    PAGE: A11   EDITION: METRO 
SOURCE: Sue Lindsey Editorial Writer
DATELINE:                                 LENGTH: Medium

MEASURING SUCCESS IN LIFE

THE TWO sisters are at different places in their lives. They've both, officially anyway, reached adulthood. Sibling rivalry for the most part is behind them; they've discovered they really are friends. But one's still in high school, and planning for the prom. The other, just a few years older, is married and has a child. She's planning the rest of her life.

The prom-planner is content with her lot these days. Graduation is coming up, and she's eager to sample life after high school. She's excited about her new after-school job, making sandwiches at a sub shop.

The life-planner is unsettled. She wants to make a worthwhile contribution to society, but doesn't see any at hand. She's seen more of the world than her sister, and finds it a little overwhelming.

This young woman, of course, is overlooking her roles as wife and mother. And in fact, is there a better contribution to society than giving a new member a secure beginning? I empathize with her, though. We all want to make a mark that shows - something that says we've been here and done our part.

Before the women's movement, this young mother might not have dreamed of doing anything more than she's doing now. And if she did dream, she might not have dared express it.

But what is success, and how do we know when we've got it? By the world's standards, fame and fortune remain the criteria. Yet the rich and famous often lead troubled personal lives.

During most of my working life, I have placed a lot of importance on career success. I have measured my worth by the job I was holding. That standard is rough when you're between jobs or in one that doesn't feed the ego.

But the people I've come to consider most successful are ones who lead whole lives. Some are professionals; others hold routine jobs or none at all. All are productive, though. What I find remarkable about these people is their commitment to the well-being of people around them. They share themselves freely, and look on others - family, neighbors, co-workers - as friends.

Working hard at a good job can contribute to wholeness, but it's not the total answer. I believe it's more important to make the most of where I am.

The young woman who's excited about her job making subs may not feel that way after slicing onions for a few months. I hope her enthusiasm lasts awhile, though. She makes the people around her feel good.

I like the saying, "Bloom where you're planted." It can make each day successful, even if, like the young mother, you're not exactly where you want to be. I also believe that in the long run, it leads to good transplants.

by CNB