Roanoke Times
                 Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: SATURDAY, May 19, 1990                   TAG: 9005190063
SECTION: EXTRA                    PAGE: E-1   EDITION: METRO 
SOURCE: Ben Beagle
DATELINE:                                 LENGTH: Medium

THIS TIME ON WALTONS MOUNTAIN . . .

OK. So he's running for Congress in California. I'm not going to let that stop me from taking us back again to Waltons Mountain.

We're going to change things a little bit and have him running for Congress during the Depression.

We know, of course, that Pa Walton would never decide to run for anything without talking it over with the family.

Thus, we find Pa and Ma Walton in the kitchen, where Ma is preparing oysters Rockefeller for a light snack, along with a bottle of very good wine.

"I dunno, Olivia," Pa Walton says. "I don't know if I'm cut out to be up there with all of those fancy fellows."

Pa Walton says this, despite the fact that the family has four cars, eats better than the President of the United States, and is chockful of real smart people.

"I think you should, John," Ma Walton says. "I think you have been wasting too much time at the Dew Drop Inn, and Grandpa could certainly run the sawmill."

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself," says Grandpa Walton, entering the kitchen hurriedly. "This generation of Americans has a rendezvous with destiny."

"You're sauced again, you old fool," says Grandma Walton, who is chasing him.

"Neither a borrower nor a lender be," Grandpa says.

"Shut up, you old goat," Grandma says. "We have to help John make a decision."

"Right," says Ma Walton. "We'd miss you, but we could certainly make do with three cars if you took one up to Washington."

John-Boy Walton enters with his composition book under his arm.

"I think you should run, papa," John-Boy says. "I hope I'm not being immodest when I say you already have the services of the best speech writer and manager in America, which is your son here."

(None of the other Walton children is going to appear here. They are out doing good things and thinking good thoughts, which is fine because we don't have enough space for all of them to talk.)

"All of you are right," Pa Walton says. "I'll call Ike at the general store and tell him it's all right to offer my name for the nomination at the convention in Lovingston next Saturday."

"Right, Papa," says John-Boy. "Now let's go over to Charlottesville and buy you a suit of clothes. We've got an image problem to overcome, and those gallused overalls don't help.

"And from now on, no more foolin' around with the bimbos down at the Dew Drop Inn."