
                         Roanoke Times
                 Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: SUNDAY, June 10, 1990                   TAG: 9006070336
SECTION: EXTRA                    PAGE: E-7   EDITION: METRO 
SOURCE: Associated Press
DATELINE: NEW YORK                                LENGTH: Short

FATHERS DON'T ALWAYS KNOW BEST, BOOK SAYS

"When I say no, I mean no. Why? Because, that's why."

If you've ever heard these words from your father, you know that dads can be responsible for saying some pretty dumb things.

At least that's the contention of Bruce Lansky and K.L. Jones, who have compiled a book of fatherly sayings called "Dads Say the Dumbest Things!: A Collection of Fatherly Wit and Wisdom" (Meadowbrook Press, $5.95).

But, "Dads really aren't as dumb as they seem," explains Lansky in the book's introduction. It's just that "when dads are flustered, sometimes the only thing they can come up with is what their dads used to say. Even if what their dads used to say used to drive them crazy."

Some examples, from among the hundreds in the collection:

"I'm spanking you because I love you. This hurts me a lot more than it hurts you."

"If you fall out of that tree and break your leg, don't come running to me."

"Coffee will stunt your growth."

"We're not lost. I'm just not sure where we are."

"Can't you practice the drums quietly?"

by CNB