Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: SUNDAY, April 14, 1991 TAG: 9104120284
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: E-1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: JANE SEE WHITE/ STAFF WRITER
DATELINE: LENGTH: Long
It has a lot of appeal: The child spends your workdays in someone's home, with other children, under the supervision of a motherly figure (almost all home-based providers are women). The cost varies widely, but tends to fall between $45 and $80 a week.
There are other attractive options, of course - day-care centers, live-in nannies, sitters who come to your home. But finding space in a center can be difficult, and these alternatives tend to be more expensive than family or home-based day care.
If family day care is your choice, you're solidly in the mainstream: In 1989, Virginia's Joint Legislative Audit and Review Commission estimated that 176,000 children were in family day care. That's 52 percent of the 337,000 children under age 13 that JLARC estimated were in some sort of care outside their homes at least once a week.
But how do you find good family day care? It can be challenging indeed:
"Confusing" is a mild word to describe the mo rass of standards and rules established by the state and federal agencies that regulate, license and certify home providers.
There's no guarantee that the home-based providers who are licensed, certified or otherwise regulated give children loving, well-supervised, stimulating environments.
Moreover, the vast majority of family day-care providers are essentially underground, quietly caring for children without submitting to regulation by anyone.
Finally, unless you opt for a state-licensed or social-services certified home provider, it's extremely difficult - often impossible - for a parent to learn whether a provider has any kind of child-abuse or -neglect record.
Here's the bottom line: You'll get very little help in finding and choosing a good provider.
A challenging quest
Finding good home-based day care can be more art than science, more gut instinct than intellect, more personal chemistry than logic.
Peggy and John Rauck found what they regard as a perfect arrangment six years ago for their first child, Maggie, who's now in kindergarten. The Raucks' second child, 8-month-old Katie, is spending weekdays with the same woman on a Botetourt County farm. The provider keeps just three children, so she needs no state license.
"She really loves these children," said Peggy Rauck, a special programs supervisor with Social Security disability determination services. "Her whole family gets involved. Her husband used to take Maggie on tractor rides and . . . she would follow him around doing chores."
The Raucks and their day-care provider's family share holidays and birthdays, too. "She and her family are a large part of my child's life," said Peggy Rauck.
How did the Raucks find such a happy arrangement? They asked their minister's wife about the woman who was caring for her child and got an enthusiastic report. The Raucks visited the woman's home a few times and felt "really good about her."
"And I trusted my minister's wife's judgment," Peggy Rauck said.
Most parents don't stumble into such a lucky combination: a strong recommendation from someone they trust along with equally strong good feelings about a provider who, fortuitously, has a vacancy.
More commonly, finding the right family day-care setting takes a lot of thought, time and leg work.
Charlotte Gregory has had her two daughters with a home-based provider in southwest Roanoke County for three years. "We have the best," she said. "She has been a godsend."
But finding this paragon was not simple. Gregory, a teacher, compiled a list of providers recommended by friends and co-workers. She interviewed at least 15 of them by phone.
Then she followed up by visiting three of the providers during their work hours - with her daughters, then ages 1 and 2, in tow. The provider she ultimately selected was the standout: "She immediately got down on the floor with the children and played with them," Gregory said.
Where to begin?
Many parents begin their search by calling the Information and Referral Center of Southwest Virginia, operated in Roanoke by the Council of Community Services.
The center does not recommend homes - it simply provides a list of licensed providers. It's up to parents to check them out and find a place with a vacancy, said Pam Kestner-Chappelear, the council's director of community resources. Some companies contract with the center to help employees find vacancies.
Most licensed providers don't have vacancies often - and most get calls almost daily from parents seeking care.
"I probably get five calls a week, mostly from people with infants," said Susan O'Brien, a licensed home day-care provider in Roanoke County. O'Brien and other licensed providers often keep waiting lists.
Linda Humphries is a family day-care provider who also operates The Child Care Referral Service from her home. In 1985 when she first placed a classified ad for the service, she figured that if she got two calls a day from parents, she could make a go of it.
"I had 15 or 16 calls the very first day," she said. "People were desperate." Six years later, she said, she still gets about 50 calls a month.
Humphries charges parents $35 for a list of about 15 family day-care providers, who also pay to be on the list. There are about 85 provider names in her active file now.
"The vast majority of the sitters I list are not licensed because they don't want to keep more than five children and the state will not license you unless you do," Humphries said.
Humphries matches parents with likely providers by comparing the preferences they list on information forms. Parents give the child's age, hours they need care and special preferences, such as a non-smoking environment. Providers list the ages of children they prefer, hours they'll work, play equipment, child-rearing philosophy and more.
Parents get copies of the forms filled out by the providers Humphries thinks would make the best match. But Humphries does not investigate or otherwise screen caregivers. Again, it's up to the parents to interview candidates and make the choice.
"You know what you need. I don't," Humphries said.
What to look for
Evaluating providers takes thought and time - and it's also where instincts and personal chemistry come into play. A number of agencies provide guidelines for evaluating a child-care provider and her home, but everyone involved agrees that the lines are blurred.
"I had one sitter that two families had opposite reactions to. The first family thought her house was run-down and messy," Humphries said. "The second family loved her and said her house always smelled great because she cooked a lot."
The list of issues to consider can get pretty long. In a pamphlet called "The ABC's of Quality Day Care," the state Department of Social Services recommends that parents look for (among other things):
A person with experience or training in child care and child development; "who talks directly to your child and listens to his/her questions, opinions, problems;" who respects your opinions on childraising, including discipline, play activities, television viewing and toilet training; and who will keep you informed about your child's behavior and activities; and
A setting with fenced outdoor play and exercise area; that is clean and well-ventilated and has smoke detectors, good bathroom facilities for small children; and with precautions in place, such as safety caps on electrical sockets, and cleaning supplies stored out of a child's reach.
"It's important to think though what's important to you in advance and to talk about these things with the provider," said Kestner-Chappelear of the information and referral service.
Discipline is a key issue. If you don't believe in spanking, for instance, you won't want to retain a caregiver who insists that it's the most effective technique.
"If they're going to do things the parents can't agree with, the parents shouldn't leave their child there. You have to decide in advance what you can tolerate,"said Judy Brown of Child Protective Services in Roanoke City.
Area child-abuse hot lines get very few complaints about family day-care providers; in the city, there were fewer than 20 such calls last year, Brown said. And only about one-third of those turned out to be legally valid, she said.
When parents do complain, most often it's about discipline. They may feel a sitter has been "too gruff with a child, or emotionally abusive," Brown said.
Susan O'Brien, a licensed provider in Roanoke County, suggests asking the caregiver how your child's time will be spent.
For instance, a provider who cares mainly for preschoolers may have "regular times when she does things with her kids," O'Brien said. "I'm looser about it because the children I keep range from infancy to 4 years old, and it's almost impossible to get them all doing the same thing. Some of the very grandmotherly types just give the children lots of love and attention."
Cindy Loving, who cares for three toddlers in her home in Southwest Roanoke, urged parents to interview the caregiver during her workday so they can "see how she is with the children she's caring for. And it's a good idea to ask for references" - and to call them.
It's also important, said Loving, "to take time to talk to the caregiver when you're still choosing a place. This is where your child will be, and you're going to see this provider two times a day, every day - but these are busy times, when you're rushing to work or home. You've got to get to know each other in the interview and to like each other then."
Be sure to ask the caregiver if you will be welcome to make occasional unannounced visits to her home during the workday. If she balks, it could be a warning flag.
As for checking whether a home-based provider has any a history of child abuse or neglect or any convictions of crimes against children, good luck.
Licensed providers undergo a records check for convictions of crimes against children in Virginia. And under the state's Freedom of Information act, said Donna Baber, regional licensing administrator of the state Department of Social Services, her office must reveal to parents who request the information whether there have been any complaints about licensed providers. If the answer is yes, they'll tell you the number and type of complaints, and whether they were valid.
Checking out unlicensed providers is nearly impossible. Officials at child protective services, which investigates abuse and neglect complaints, say they cannot reveal to parents whether their records show any substantiated complaints against a provider. However, Kestner-Chappelear said, providers can request a criminal records check and show the documentation to parents.
Making it work
You won't have an arrangement that gives you peace of mind and your child a happy workday routine unless you build a solid relationship with the caregiver you choose.
Most providers say good communication with parents makes their jobs easier: They want to know what you expect and they want you to understand and respect their needs and preferences.
Many caregivers resent being treated as if they were just nice women earning a little mad money on the side. They regard themselves as professionals and their family day-care enterprises as livelihoods.
Three years ago, about 40 home-care providers organized a support group called the Family Child Care Providers. They meet once a month to hear speakers or take part in workshops, with subjects ranging from early-childhood development to tax issues they face.
They phone each other for advice and support on problems, such as the parent who is chronically late in collecting a child after work. And the group distributes helpful materials on nutrition, safety, first aid, infant care and such.
Each member also gets a copy of a model contract that the group recommends she adapt and use.
"I didn't use a contract the first six months I was in business - until I found the support group," said Cindy Loving. "The contract was a lifesaver for me. I was being taken advantage of in so many ways."
How? "Some mothers tended to have the attitude that they work out in the real world and they're professionals - and I'm just hanging out babysitting. But this is my job - I earn my living at this. And one mother would tell me at the last minute, `Oh, my kids won't be here next week,' and, of course, she wouldn't pay me."
All the caregivers interviewed for this article use a contract. Typically it covers such matters as their hours of operation; late pick-up fees; policies about parents' and their own vacations; rules about sick children; and details like who provides the food and diapers.
"Parents readily accept the contract. We've found that when you use one, they treat you more professionally and ask their questions upfront," said Cheryl Stover, a licensed provider who helped organize the support group.
Taking care of small children all day isn't an easy way to make a living, providers say. "It's tough," O'Brien said. "If you get 30 minutes to yourself over the course of the day, you're lucky - and that's why there's a lot of turnover in this work."
So once you find a good provider, treat her well: "Have consideration for your caregiver's family time and lifestyle," O`Brien said. "Pick up your child on time; sometimes I have something I need to do in the evening. And express your feelings. If you have a concern about your child, then I need to know about it."
A wiser, more experienced Loving said parents no longer take advantage of her. "They treat me like gold and, in return, I try to treat them professionally, too."\
by CNB