Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: SUNDAY, April 14, 1991 TAG: 9104140339
SECTION: HORIZON PAGE: B-5 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: By JERRY HULSE/ LOS ANGELES TIMES
DATELINE: WAIKOLOA, HAWAII LENGTH: Long
Well, it is. Sort of.
Picture man-made waterfalls spilling into man-made lagoons alongside man-made canals backed up by man-made cliffs and you begin to understand why the lady was bewildered.
I mean, when was the last time you saw a train pull into a hotel lobby to pick up a guest? Or eyeballed a boat cruising through a jungle on underwater rails. A man-made jungle at that.
The fact is, this amusement park is really a hotel - the $360 million Hyatt Regency Waikoloa - which has been open 2 1/2 years.
And the idea for the train is to deliver guests between Waikoloa's three hotel towers that face the mile-long track.
Or guests can climb aboard one of those sleek Venetian-style boats with the crews all dressed like Navy admirals. Never mind that the boats operate automatically. The young men and women in the gold-braid uniforms act the role of helmsmen in this 1990 version of Fantasy Island that's being produced along the Big Island's Kohala Coast.
At Waikoloa, man-made lava appears everywhere, which seems a bit odd because the island's volcanoes are still spewing up the real stuff.
Those who knew and loved old Hawaii may find Waikoloa beyond comprehension. Gigantic and expensive, it is representative of other mega-resorts that are out of touch with the old, unspoiled Hawaii, the fragile beauty of which is rapidly disintegrating - along with a culture and gentleness of its people that was so special to these islands.
As the most expensive resort ever built, the Hyatt Regency Waikoloa features 1,241 rooms, eight restaurants, a dozen lounges, an immense heath spa and enough water to float a fleet of ocean liners.
One of the world's largest destination resorts, the Hyatt stretches across 64 acres of once-barren, lava-encrusted earth that previously rejected anything that walked, flew or grew. Now flamingos strut and peacocks preen in the man-made jungle, while dolphins leap in their man-made lagoon.
Waikoloa was the fantasy of Christopher B. Hemmeter, the entrepreneur who built the Hyatt Regency in Waikiki, the enormously successful Hyatt Regency at Kaanapali Beach on Maui and the Westin Kauai with its Clydesdale horses, other man-made canals and a reflecting pool that would fit nicely beside a Grecian temple.
Remember, Hemmeter is a dreamer, and dreams are what he had in mind for vacationers when he developed the Hyatt Regency Waikoloa. (Once he predicted that the entire Kohala Coast would be lined with hotels, homes and condominiums - from Mauna Kea nearly to Kailua-Kona).
The lady from South Carolina was on target - Waikoloa truly is an amusement park. A favorite attraction is a swim with the dolphins. But because Waikoloa possesses only six dolphins (and receives dozens of requests), a daily dolphin lottery is conducted. Thus, only a handful of guests win the chance to take the plunge.
Rising from an endless sea of black lava, the Hyatt Regency Waikoloa shocks the senses. Hemmeter transformed a stark moonscape into a tropical garden by spreading thousands of truckloads of topsoil over the lava, sprinkling it with tons of grass seed and transplanting more than 1,600 palm trees at $1,000 apiece.
The result is a do-it-yourself oasis.
Because Waikoloa cost a bundle, guests pay a bundle to vacation. The cheapest room goes for $215 per night. Add to this a $20.27 room tax. Then there's the mandatory "aloha service fee" ($12.50) that goes to the bellman. (Question: Whatever happened to the much-ballyhooed "aloha spirit"?)
There's more.
It costs $3.12 a day to use the room safe and $17 for the bus ride from the airport (in case you didn't rent wheels). On top of this, guests are asked to cough up an extra $150 for the privilege of charging meals to their rooms, a sum that is refunded if one doesn't run a tab.
All of this is peanuts compared to the price of other Waikoloa fantasies.
Heading the list is a private picnic for two at 3,000-foot Lauhala Point, a secluded spot that is reached by helicopter. The two-hour jaunt, which includes a flight over ranches and volcanoes, comes to a whopping $1,325 per couple. An extra hour runs the tab up another $760.
Other couples are delivered on sunset dinner cruises, complete with a valet. Upon returning, the couple is whisked away by chauffeured limousine to the womb at Waikoloa. The five-hour package figures out to $1,470 per twosome.
There are myriad other choices. Take the five-course meal at historic Hulihee Palace, the former retreat of Hawaii's kings and queens in the village of Kailua-Kona. This dinner features the favorite dishes of King Kalakaua and a check for $2,745 - the price for four guests.
The same foursome can join an eight-hour tour of the 2,200-acre Kahua Ranch, helping round up cattle with the paniolos (Hawaiian cowboys) for a mere $2,150, which figures out to a few bucks under $270 per hour.
On Hawaii's famous Parker Ranch, Waikoloa's guests hunt wild boar, wild turkey, goats and sheep that wind up on the dinner table back at the hotel. The price for playing Jungle Jim is $825 for the first hunter and $395 apiece for others joining the safari.
Not all fantasies are so expensive. A six-hour bird-watching safari is bid at $226, and there are horseback rides ($40), tours of Parker Ranch ($30.80), a trip by ocean submarine ($67), visits to the volcanoes ($45) and star-gazing cruises by sailboat ($55). Waikoloa lists other choices, including golf at the major courses ($60 and $75 for 18 holes).
Waikoloa bills itself as "the most spectacular resort on earth." A brochure gushes: "The senses are indulged, passions are requited and the pursuit of happiness is limited only by your imagination."
The resort's $2 million Grand Staircase descends to a saltwater lagoon boiling with tropical fish. Meanwhile, the train races back and forth at eight-minute intervals.
And then, well . . . there are the statues. Peering from the foliage are Buddhas, nymphs and an assortment of other creatures. It gets downright spooky at times, especially at night when one comes eyeball to eyeball with a marble dragon.
Because Waikoloa was carved out of a wasteland of lava that flows to the ocean itself, it was necessary to create a beach. The truth be told, it's not much of a beach. Furthermore, it was necessary to haul in each grain of sand. One can wind surf, but it's a disappointingly short ride. On the other hand, sunbathers are lulled to sleep by the splashing of waterfalls.
Of Waikoloa's eight restaurants, Donatoni's rates high for both atmosphere and fare. Its pastas can't be faulted and the entrees are guaranteed to please the fussiest gourmet (The tab one night for a pasta dish, a salad and one glass of wine came to a trifle over $49).
Add to this Italian melodies and soft Pacific breezes and this could be a romantic haunt along Italy's Amalfi Drive. But isn't this supposed to be Hawaii?
As a self-contained resort, Waikoloa takes on all requests. Couples wishing to tie the knot need only pick up the phone and dial 51.
Faster than they can say "I do," a justice of the peace appears on the scene. Once a couple requested an underwater wedding. No problem, said the staff. Within minutes, a padre decked out in scuba gear was on the scene, where rumor has it that the ceremony was performed to the tune of "Tiny Bubbles."
Still, there's more to the Kohala Coast than the Hyatt Regency Waikoloa. Next door, the Royal Waikoloan, with its splendid white-sand beach, faces Anaehoomalu Bay, which is where King Kamehameha came to keep cool on hot summer days.
Scattered through the grounds are royal fish ponds and petroglyphs that date centuries before the first tourist waded ashore. At the Royal Waikoloan, old Hawaii is kept alive with hukilaus, where visitors learn to net fish in the traditional island style, and by beach boys who still teach guests how to paddle a canoe. A harpist plays in the Tiare Room, and mai tais are poured in a pub called the Lava Tube.
by CNB