by Archana Subramaniam by CNB![]()
Roanoke Times Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc. DATE: SUNDAY, March 7, 1993 TAG: 9303050262 SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: 1 EDITION: METRO SOURCE: Cody Lowe DATELINE: LENGTH: Long
IF YOU DON'T SUBSCRIBE TO SATIRE . . .
Something new on The Back Pew this week - a commercial. Well, more like a public-service announcement.This one is for a little magazine called The Door. (No, I'm not getting a kick-back.)
There are lots of good magazines for "people of faith." Lots of good denominational magazines, lots of good inspirational magazines, more than enough magazines with articles such as "Theocentric piety: The spirit of reforming Protestantism."
There are precious few Christian satire magazines. Maybe no other ones. This one is funny, and not nearly enough people know about it.
So I'm gonna tell you a little about The Door.
The magazine comes out six times a year. I think. It's hard to tell because it's never on time. (Believe it or not, dozens of loyal readers consider this an endearing quality.)
For instance the "Jan./Feb." issue just arrived last week.
But the wait is always worth it.
What you notice first (but discriminating readers read last) are the interviews. They are set up in a question-and-answer format, so you get a feel for the wise-guy kind of questions these guys sometimes ask.
This month, for instance, is the "Irritating Issue" - which fairly sizzles because back-to-back are interviews with the Rev. John Shelby Spong and the Rev. Jerry Falwell.
From the introduction to the Spong interview: "John Shelby Spong is the Ph.D. of irritating. He can irritate inanimate objects. Having a middle name like Shelby doesn't help things. But the main reason he's so irritating is his theology. He has attacked about every sacred cow fundamentalists - and conservatives, for that matter - consider non-negotiable: the Virgin Birth, the inerrancy of Scripture, homosexuality, sexuality, premarital sex."
From the introduction to the Falwell interview: "For a long time Jerry Falwell was the head honcho of the Moral Majority, an organization that managed to irritate everyone. What has really irritated a lot of people lately is that he is talking about reviving the Moral Majority. But you know what is really irritating? Jerry's not all that irritating in person."
The interviews are short, but tough. Well, usually pretty tough. Spong and Falwell are challenged to defend themselves.
But the real fun is the fiction, which doesn't always work but is usually reliable.
In a mock "Who's Who Among American Pastors," one entry is for Presbyterian minister "Sandra Plont" whose accomplishments include "debate, boxing, mud wrestling, archery, skeet shooting; has pastored four churches full of griping, bigoted people; feels predestined to happiness someday in a neutered church. . . . will star is upcoming youth video, `My Pastor Wears a Bra.' "
Another entry is for a United Methodist minister who "Loves to move often; once liked the bishop; . . . can eat the last dregs of green bean casserole at pitch-in dinners; has united with two wives previously; likes to move up in class; . . . has fathered five children despite having but one testicle."
Or how about an article asking us to "suppose Oliver Stone were a good Fundy filmmaker with a truly cosmic conspiratorial perspective." That's accompanied, of course, by a detailed look at the conspiracy surrounding the "single-stone theory" of David's slaying of Goliath.
These guys also have a knack - and great sources - for their "Truth is Stranger than Fiction" segment. This includes stuff like the ad for "Lucky Money - $ - A real, legal U.S. Jesus Dollar Bill" with Jesus' picture where George's should be. (Only $5 each). Or how about the "Choose Your King" wristwatch offer? For only $30, you get either Jesus or Elvis on the face of the watch.
With humor and satire and, sometimes, pathos, the articles provoke thought, challenge convention, twist perspectives.
The editorial viewpoint is pretty mainstream evangelical Christianity, the brand the authors most often caricature. But they poke fun at fundamentalists and liberals and everybody in between. They irritate everybody sooner or later.
Senior Editor (and co-owner) Mike Yaconelli answers the phone if you call up the magazine's number in tiny Yreka (pronounced wie-REEK-ah), Calif.
The soon-to-be 22-year-old magazine is not as vituperative as it once was, Yaconelli - who recently turned 50 - concedes.
It was begun as an anti-establishment youth-oriented satire magazine and has mellowed as Yaconelli has, he says. It was originally called the Wittenburg Door - you know, after the door Martin Luther nailed his 99 theses to when he fired up the Protestant Reformation. And while the magazine hasn't actually started a new reformation, it does stir up some sh-- (a word that does infrequently appear in its pages, though it doesn't in this newspaper).
It's 8,500 subscribers tend to be white, college-educated, Protestant, over 30, and about two-thirds of them are males. Which is a shame because there is so much to appeal to everyone.
The magazine - which was almost forced to shut down a year ago in a financial crunch - has cut costs dramatically, in part by scaling down its size, and now is "breaking even," Yaconelli said this week.
Unfortunately, no library in Western Virginia seems to carry the magazine - which Yaconelli says has to be kept on the reserve list some places to prevent its disappearance. "We probably should do a better job of marketing," Yaconelli admits.
The magazine is "still evolving," he said. "I'd like to make a contribution on the positive side" of Christianity, he says, rather than just "screaming and yelling, ranting and raving."
That doesn't mean the juices don't start flowing sometimes even now, though. Just mentioning Texas TV preacher Robert Tilton, for instance, can stir up Yaconelli's blood.
Ultimately, though, it is because he cared so much for the church that he keeps the magazine going. "I think satire is best done by people who love" what they are satirizing, he said.
The proof is in his pages.
Subscriptions are $22.95 a year. Satisfaction guaranteed, I expect. You can write Yaconelli and The Door at Box 530, Yreka, Calif., 96097.
\ Cody Lowe reports on issues of religion and ethics for this newspaper.