
                         Roanoke Times
                 Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: MONDAY, May 3, 1993                   TAG: 9305030288
SECTION: EDITORIAL                    PAGE: A6   EDITION: METRO 
SOURCE: 
DATELINE:                                 LENGTH: Short

COMMENTARY INSULTS LOVING, CARING MEN

I AM COMPELLED to respond to Justin Askins' comments regarding date rape and how women should acknowledge their "responsibility" in these cases (April 7 commentary, "Women should take their part of responsibility for `date rape' ").

To perpetuate the myth that men have this propensity to "uncontrollable lust" is to insult the millions of men who somehow manage to approach sex in a loving, caring manner and who would not dream of forcing a woman to satisfy his need against her wishes. When we're talking about sharing such an important part of one's self, I don't think it's too much to ask that both partners be freely consenting. At whatever point, and for whatever reason, either partner does not desire to continue, then for the other to forceably persist is brutally criminal, and is not "understandable assault"!

Having been the victim of a rape that Askins would have no argument classifying as such, I would hope no woman that he cares for ever has to go through being raped by someone she does or does not know. There's not much difference, except for the additional shattering of trust that goes with being violently abused by someone you know.

I shudder to imagine whether his convoluted reasoning and carefully chosen literary allusions somehow help him rationalize a situation that may be weighing on his conscience. With his ideas, I also shudder to think he is an educator.

KAREN S. MILLER\ ROANOKE

by CNB