Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: SATURDAY, June 12, 1993 TAG: 9306140052
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: 1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: MIKE MAYO
DATELINE: LENGTH: Long
There you might want to take a look at a wonderfully incorrect little number from 1965, "How To Murder Your Wife." It represents the last gasp of posttwar, pre-feminist, rampantly heterosexist film humor. In those years, God was in his heaven and it was OK for rich white males to do whatever they pleased.
Jack Lemmon, in one of his funniest roles, is successful cartoonist and man about town Stanley Ford. Terry Thomas is his butler. They live in a swanky New York townhouse "pad," straight from the pages of Playboy magazine, where they treat women as objects and generally have a fine old time. But one fateful night, Stanley goes to a bachelor party and spies a beautiful Italian blonde (Virna Lisi) popping out of a cake.
The next morning, he wakes up with a hangover, and she has a ring on her finger. These being the days before no-fault instant divorce, breaking up really is hard to do. No, she won't go to Nevada. Besides, she doesn't even speak English. Whenever Stanley vows to put his foot down and end the relationship, she flashes him a come-hither look and he comes hither.
There's only one answer.
Even though women in general and wives in particular (if mine is at all typical) may not be amused by this fluff, the film really is even-handed in its insulting stereotypes. Under the pretext of misogyny, the story emasculates all the male characters - Eddie Mayehoff is particularly funny as Stanley's henpecked lawyer. For those whose sensibilities aren't thoroughly inflamed, director Richard Quine ("Bell, Book and Candle") turns it all into slick Hollywood entertainment. And Neal Hefti's lively score is quintessential 1960s jazz-pop.
Videophiles who demand equal time might consider a double feature of "How To Murder Your Wife" and "Desperately Seeking Susan." This 1985 comedy shows the other side of the coin. In it, the women played by Roseanna Arquette and Madonna (typecast as a bimbo's bimbo) are smart, resourceful, adventurous and triumphant. The men, Aiden Quinn and Mark Blum, are sex objects and/or thick-headed dolts.
Director Susan Seidelman handles the action - involving amnesia, mistaken identity and ancient Egyptian treasure - with a deft hand. She's at ease with the offbeat characters, but it's just as interesting to watch the way she uses light, and fills almost every shot with delightful secondary action. The stranger side of New York has seldom been more tacky and vibrant.
Turning reluctantly to the New Releases shelf of the video store, we find a host of salacious titles beginning with "The Bikini Carwash Company II." Fans of the original will remember that a brainy beach babe (Kristi Ducati) transformed a floundering carwash into a flourishing business. As this sequel begins, a big company is offering to buy her out. What to do? Should she continue to run the carwash or become a corporate executrix? Will it be suds and thongs or power suits?
As silly sex comedies go, this one is shallow, silly and suggestive - just as it should be.
\ "L.A. Goddess" is, at times, a true comedy, but more often, its laughs are unintentional. The story concerns a stunt woman (Kathy Shower) who's writing a script. When a high-powered producer (David Heavener) learns about it, he invites her to spend a few weeks at his mansion where she can write in peace and quiet. He is, he swears, interested in her story, not her body. Sure.
This one could have been a combination of "The Player" and "The Stuntman," but gloriously bad acting and a really slow pace undermine that comparison. Still, for those who know anything about how the movie business works, "L.A. Goddess" is a tongue-in-cheek Hollywood fantasy.
\ "The Turn On" is based on the work of Italian comic artist Milo Manara. Judging by the credits, it was made by a French production company in New Orleans. The cast is unknown in this country. The premise - a gizmo that makes women sexually insatiable - is an adolescent fantasy, and the general level of the action never rises above that level. The production values are fine with a distinctly European cast to the soft-core humor.\
The Essentials:
How To Murder Your Wife: *** for men; **, at best, for most women. MGM/UA. 118 min. Unrated, contains no blatantly objectionable material, depending on your point of view.
Desperately Seeking Susan: HBO. 100 min. Rated PG-13 for language, sexual situations, brief nudity.
The Bikini Carwash Company II: ***1/2 Imperial. 94 min. R- rated and unrated for nudity, sexual content, strong language.
L.A. Goddess: **1/2 Prism. 93 min. R-rated and unrated for nudity, sexual content, strong language.
The Turn On: ** New Horizons. 80 min. Unrated, contains nudity, sexual content, strong language.
New releases this week:
Body of Evidence (R): *1/2
Stars Madonna, Joe Mantegna, Willem Dafoe. Directed by Uli Edel. Warner (MGM/UA). Rated R for language, nudity and strong sexual content. 99 minutes.
Silly courtroom drama that created controversy because of Madonna's willingness to indulge in sexual antics on screen. She plays a woman who is charged with murder after her older boyfriend dies as the result their bedroom activities.
The Lover (R): **1/2
Stars Jane March, Tony Leung. Directed by Jean-Jacques Annaud. Warner (MGM/UA). Rated R for extremely strong sexual content and nudity; 99 minutes.
Sexually volatile but emotionally distant movie based on Marguerite Duras's novel. The story looks at the romance between a French School girl of 17 and a wealthy Chinese man twice her age.
by CNB