Roanoke Times
                 Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: WEDNESDAY, June 23, 1993                   TAG: 9306230084
SECTION: EXTRA                    PAGE: 1   EDITION: METRO  
SOURCE: Ben Beagle
DATELINE:                                 LENGTH: Medium

OPRAH'S BOOK IS NO GREAT LOSS

I immediately fell into deep melancholia, and people started worrying about me.

"Why are you sad, Bennie?" one of them asked. "Are you sure you don't need counselling?"

And I replied: "Don't tell me to get counselling, Jack. That won't bring Oprah's book on the market any sooner. God. I've looked forward to that milestone in publishing for months, and now, all has come to naught."

It's true. I've been looking forward to what The New York Post called her "previous sex encounters." The Post said this part of her book had upset her boy friend, Stedman Graham. Stedman Graham?

Never heard of him, but it was reported he said he would break off their engagement if Oprah published on schedule this fall.

What's this guy's trouble? You can't sell a book of any kind these days unless you put a little sex in it.

Anyway, Oprah said that neither the boyfriend nor the sex had nothing to do with it.

The Associated Press quoted her as saying: "The whole process of writing it has opened my mind in ways that I would not have unless I had had the time devoted to years of therapy. I'm just trying to step back from that and assess what does all that really mean."

Whatever that means. Maybe Oprah will explain why she started talking like George Bush when she gets around to publishing her book.

I will say here that I've done my share of writing in my day, and my mind remains just about as closed as it was when I started.

Nevertheless, I wanted badly to hear her tell her own story of how she lost all that weight that time. I remember doing some detailed research at that time and finding that six Oprahs would fit into one pair of my jeans. I believe this is longer the case, however, although my jeans are bigger now.

I hope she will include a chapter on how she stands all of the trash that goes on her show without going berserk and attacking the participants. Money, I'd guess.

I know that this is not exactly like Charles Dickens postponing "The Pickwick Papers," but the wire service said Oprah "rocked the publishing world" with her decision.

I know that many of you out there are feeling just as forlorn and betrayed as I do.

But let's bear this shocking revelation and look to the future.

There are other things to read while waiting for Oprah's terse, simple prose.

Stephen King puts out a new book every day or so.