Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: MONDAY, December 20, 1993 TAG: 9312210244
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: 1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: Ben Beagle
DATELINE: LENGTH: Medium
I have feared for the future of my native state a lot in my time, and recent developments in Richmond have unnerved me terribly.
Right. This isn't the first time I've been unnerved terribly, and now the recent confusion over who the governor can fire or can't fire filled me with dread.
And right, I've been filled with dread before.
Gov.-elect George Allen told certain members of the government to check out and be quick about it.
Then, he said he shouldn't have done that; that he was led astray by Gov. Douglas Wilder, who sent him a list of people he [Wilder] said he [Allen] could fire.
(It has been my experience that things are really getting confused when a highly talented writer such as myself has to start using brackets.)
It sounds a little like the Mad Hatter is at work in the capital, although I don't think his name was on the pink-slip list.
(I don't know where he works, but I've been convinced for years that the Mad Hatter has been employed by the state for a long time. Not to mention the White Rabbit.)
Fear and dread always cause my imagination to heat up, and I began to imagine a time when the governor-elect, being told by the outgoing governor that it's all right, fires much of the western part of the state.
You know. A transition person comes into the office and says: ``Good news, governor. It looks like you can ax Craig County any time you want to. And say goodbye to Mouth of Wilson.''
I can hear some of you now saying that Old Bennie got into the wassail bowl early.
Listen. You people have got to realize that Eastern and Northern Virginia would love to get rid of everything west of Rockbridge County - with the possible exceptions of Salem and Vinton.
In the meantime, there was great confusion among state employees in Richmond and the kind of panic that reports of Union gunboats in the James River used to create.
I don't know what it is about working for the state, but I've seen a lot of panic by state employees in my time - even when the sitting governor knew who he could fire.
I don't know what will happen eventually. We can hope, I guess, that the Mad Hatter doesn't end up as the superintendent of state police or that White Rabbit isn't appointed transportation commissioner.
I do know, however, that the entire affair cries out for a moral, which should be:
``A governor who doesn't know whom he can fire probably got a gentleman's `C' in civics class.''
by CNB