Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: SATURDAY, May 21, 1994 TAG: 9405240050
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: B-12 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: By KATHERINE REED STAFF WRITER
DATELINE: LENGTH: Medium
Okay. There it is: the meaning of life, the bottom, philosophical line of "Even Cowgirls Get the Blues," Gus Van Sant Jr.'s new film of the popular 1970s Tom Robbins book. You can search high and low in this quirky little movie, and you won't find anything a whole lot more weighty than that.
But it really doesn't matter.
"Cowgirls," a silly story about a woman named Sissy with very large thumbs- which she puts to good use as a virtuon entertaining early-'70s souvenir.
Enjoyment requires a diligent suspension of disbelief: Pretend that Uma Thurman as Sissy, standing at the side of the road in short-shorts, boots and a tight T-shirt would need any help at all from a set of extra-large thumbs getting cars to screech to a halt. Or that anyone would name a health spa-ranch after a douche bag. Or that you can hypnotize a chicken by spinning it 20 times in the air. (Can you?)
Author Robbins narrates this 1960s hangover, which begins sometime in 1973. Sissy has collected a letter from her post office box inviting her to New York where her old agent and friend, The Countess (John Hurt), is waiting to introduce her to someone who can finally relieve her of her virginity. The date with Jonah (Keanu Reaves) is an unmitigated disaster, but Crispin Glover and Sean Young are very funny as part of Jonah's jaded party gang, who "take care of" Sissy by trying to lure her into a menage a trois.
Sissy's thumbs ache when she's too far from the road, so she's off again- this time to a job at the Countess' Rubber Rose Ranch, where ex-model Sissy is to shoot a commercial for the Countess' line of feminine hygiene products. The ranch, says the Countess with characteristic aplomb, is a place aging women go "to pretty themselves up for the next disappointment."
The ranch, however, is ripe for a coup. The cowgirls- headed by peyote-popping Dolores (Lorraine Bracco) and Bonanza Jellybean (Rain Phoenix, the not-so-talented sister of River Phoenix )- have had enough of feminine hygiene products and men in general who believe, Dolores says, that although women may be tough, "there is a point where we'll break down and give them their dinner." The cowgirls want control of the ranch and its whooping crane flock.
Sissy's place in all of this remains uncertain, except at the side of Bonanza Jellybean. In fact, the connections are loose, the symbolism scattered like empty paper bags on the prairie. The thumbs are her gift and her burden- like femininity itself maybe? Are we working too hard here?
Well, then, ha-ha, ho-ho, hee-hee. Thurman is a perfect combination of the beauty and ugliness that Sissy requires; Angie Dickinson as ranch director Miss Adrienne is like a distress signal from Beauty Shop Hell; and Hurt, Bracco and Noriyuki "Pat" Morita as The Chink seem to be having a great time with all the ludicrousness.
Van Sant's love of open road and open sky are comfortably expressed within Robbins' story. One scene has Sissy changing the course of a shooting star with her powerful thumb. But ultimately, it's just for fun, and the director seems to have wisely taken to heart at least one piece of the book's half-baked philosophy, that "playfulness ceases to have a serious purpose when it takes itself too seriously."
Even Cowgirls Get the Blues ***
A New Line Cinemas release.1 hour and 45 minutes, rated R for language and sex.
by CNB