Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: THURSDAY, July 14, 1994 TAG: 9407290012
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: 1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: Jonathan Hunley
DATELINE: LENGTH: Medium
This standing entitles me to a variety of options.
I can now be an organ donor. You know, give the lungs to Joe Camel. I may also brush up on the old conversational skills by revealing my deepest fantasies to Ginger or Bambi on the 900-line of my choice.
I'm afraid I won't take advantage of these privileges, though.
Sorry Joe, I've got allergies. And Bambi and Ginger - for $2 a minute - forget it.
I enjoy living at home.
The two pursuits I'm most interested in as a member of the 18-and-over club are games of chance - the lottery and the Virginia Senate race.
The lottery's simple. You pick your numbers, win lots of dough, buy a beach house in the Caribbean and grow old gracefully. (Whatever that means. I think I've grown up clumsily to this point.)
The campaign fits under much the same premise. Whether you've realized it or not, it's a game, too.
In lottery terms, it's a combination of pick-the-numbers and scratch-off. You pick the candidate you like, but you don't really know what you've got until the campaign cover wears off.
Forget the issues and parties.
What we have here are four men who will risk life and liberty for the pursuit of votes.
And it's my job to pick which one is best. I won't chicken out on this task like some people.
Since this is my maiden voting voyage, it is of the utmost importance to me to pick the finest possible man for the job. The fellow I support will be the one I deem truest in a sea of dishonesty and phony loyalty.
I will act in this way because my vote is important. That may sound cheesy to some of my peers, but it's the truth. I respect the right to vote. Maybe I've seen too many of those MTV Rock the Vote commercials, but I definitely dig this voting thing.
As a semi-professional complainer, I like the slogans that say, "You can't complain about the government if you don't vote."
I know I'll probably complain about the government no matter who's elected, so this will give me a prop to lean on.
At this point, however, I'm at a loss as to who I'll pick. I've already found reasons for voting against them all.
Oliver North lied to the entire country in all of that Iran-Contra business. Oh, he wasn't convicted, as he likes to point out. But this isn't the NBA. The U.S. Senate doesn't run on a no-blood-no-foul policy.
Chuck Robb didn't lie to the whole country, just to the person who should be the most important citizen to him - his wife.
Marshall Coleman isn't plagued by untruths like these other two, but he isn't sure if he's conservative, liberal or moderate. I may not be able to classify myself either, but hey, this is my first time.
I also can't accuse Doug Wilder of lying - not to me directly, anyway - but I do blame him for cutting funding to colleges and the arts - programs I'll use at William & Mary.
It figures that something like this would happen when my first chance to vote came along. It'd be easy to choose between two guys. The least of four evils, though, is a much tougher pick.
But I'll be ready. I've already begun warming up.
I've tried to cut through all the rhetoric. I now read and watch every item I see on the race. I'm turning into a political junkie.
Some folks my age think government seems far away from Roanoke. I can see why they believe their vote doesn't really count in the long run.
But I've never been one to sit idly and let the world pass by. It may not seem as though I'm affected by this election, but I'm constantly reminded that Congress has a hand in my life as I drive down Campbell Avenue.
The sign on top of the abandoned Hardee's building downtown says that my share of the national debt is $17,000-something. I haven't begun to work full time, much less go to college.
I've got to vote so maybe the victor will go to Washington and incite change, making my life easier.
Maybe then I won't have to play the lottery in hopes of making it big.
by CNB