Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: MONDAY, August 22, 1994 TAG: 9408220073
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: 1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: By LORAINE O'CONNELL ORLANDO SENTINEL
DATELINE: LENGTH: Long
It's time for some true confessions - yours.
For example, would you keep the money if a cashier gave you more change than you were entitled to?
Could you shoot a burglar in order to protect your property? How about to protect your loved ones?
Would you report shoplifting if you saw it?
We'll let you keep your answers to yourself. But a couple of thousand Americans shared them, anonymously, with Mel Poretz, author of ``What Would You Do?'' (Fawcett Columbine, $5.99).
Poretz, who teaches marketing at the Adelphi University Schools of Business in New York, asked these and dozens of other pesky questions in a survey he mailed to 16,000 people.
What drove him to do this?
``Money,'' he replies. ``And a childhood dream of being published.''
Those twin incentives also drove two earlier Poretz surveys that became books, ``The First Really Important Survey of American Habits'' and ``Do You Do It With the Lights On?''
Most of the questions in his ``What Would You Do?'' survey called for yes or no answers, but some were open-ended and clearly inspired some deep thinking.
For instance, a certain theme park will be delighted to know that attendance is likely to spike right before Armageddon.
``Given that the world is going to come to an end in six months,'' Poretz asked, ``what one thing would you do again?''
``Take the family to Disney World'' was among the many free-form responses, along with ``max out my credit cards,'' ``go elk hunting'' and ``drink, gamble and have sex.''
Poretz got 2,810 responses for a return rate of 17.6 percent, which he says is ``exceptional'' for mail-in surveys. Academic researchers say the rate is pretty low.
``I wouldn't claim much validity for the results,'' says David Fabianic, a social science researcher at the University of Central Florida. ``For one thing, the sample size is small. And if you're dealing with self-reported items, you have to allow for distortion of response.'' In other words, lying.
Nevertheless, the responses Poretz got can provide some insight into the way we think.
For example, 81 percent of Poretz's respondents said they would give the money back if a cashier gave them too much. Conversely, 46 percent said they would gladly cheat on their income taxes if they knew they would get away with it.
Dale Midgette, a Winter Park, Fla., mental health counselor, says the high number of potential tax cheaters might reflect the fact that ``taxes are something that gets done to them, so there's a sense of 'whatever I can do to protect myself is OK.' ''
Shortchanging a cashier, on the other hand, may be seen as a more personal act of thievery that makes many people uncomfortable.
In answer to the question about shooting a burglar to protect property, 75 percent of men said heck, yes, they would pull the trigger; 45 percent of women said the same. The figures soared to 95 percent for men and 93 percent for women when it came to shooting a burglar to protect loved ones.
One factor that probably plays into those high numbers, Midgette says, is that ``with all the publicity about growing crime rates, people are both afraid and angry.''
The shoplifting question posed an interesting contradiction.
Seventy-nine percent of the respondents said they would report a shoplifter. However, in a separate question - ``Have you ever taken anything from a store without paying for it?'' - 63 percent of men and 44 percent of women said they had.
Is this hypocrisy?
Not necessarily, Midgette says.
``In some ways that response is about knowing it's not OK for ourselves either and saying, 'I see you doing something I've done, and I know it's not OK, so I'm going to turn you in because I want to make a statement about it,' '' she explains.
In other words, Midgette says, ``Somebody needs to be punished for this!''
Naturally, Poretz included plenty of sex questions.
For example: ``You are engaged to someone who lives in a distant city, but you are physically attracted to someone who lives close by. Would you have an affair with this person, knowing that there was no chance of ever being discovered?''
Thirty-eight percent of men said yup, they sure would; only 17 percent of women said the same.
Midgette is uncomfortable with gender stereotypes. However, she says, there is social conditioning that says ``for men, sexual relationships can be quite separate from a commitment, while, for women, sex is intricately involved with love.''
Another sexual proposition: ``Given the right time, place and opportunity, would you have an affair or even a one-nighter?''
Again, the guys saying yes outnumbered the women, 40 percent to 17 percent.
``It may be social conditioning in terms of how to answer the question,'' says Midgette. ``If what I believe society is saying about me as a male is that I'd be a fool not to do that, then I'm going to answer the question 'yes' even if I wouldn't do it.''
Similarly, women who think society would label them floozies for having an affair may dutifully say 'no' even though they'd gladly jump in the sack with another man, she says.
Several questions related to privacy.
Asked if they would read a spouse's diary, 58 percent of women said yes, as did 34 percent of men.
``If people are insecure or not communicating,'' Midgette says, ``it might seem like a safe way to learn about your partner, what he or she is thinking and feeling.''
When asked if they would steam open a letter addressed to their spouse and marked ``extremely confidential,'' read it and reseal it, 1.5 percent of men said yes; 29 percent of women said yes.
Says a bemused Midgette: ``That may have to do with the high percentages of men who said they would have affairs.''
WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
Here are some survey questions and answers from the new book ``What Would You Do?'' by Mel Poretz (Fawcett Columbine, $5.99):
1. You have a completely identical twin. If you had the opportunity to engage in sexual relations with your twin's mate, without your true identity being discovered, would you do so?
Men: 35 percent said yes.
Women: 0.044 percent said yes.
2. While pulling out of a parking space, you scrape the adjacent car, inflicting on it a very noticeable gash. Your own car is totally unmarked. Do you tell the owner of the parked car, who has not seen the accident occur, that you caused the damage?
Men: 84 percent said yes.
Women: 37 percent said yes.
3. Your closest friend was brutally murdered. You have been asked to press the button that will end the murderer's life. Can you bring yourself to do this?
Men: 80 percent said yes.
Women: 46 percent said yes.
4. Have you ever displayed in your home a hated, ugly and useless gift just because the donor happened to be paying you a visit?
Men: 35 percent said yes.
Women: 47 percent said yes.
5. Would you remain in a marriage if you found out that your mate had had one extramarital relationship?
Men: 61 percent said yes.
Women: 73 percent said yes.
6. What if it happened more than once?
Men: 31 percent said yes.
Women: 16 percent said yes.
7. A person you have never seen before leaves a public restroom trailing a length of toilet paper. Do you do anything to short-circuit this person's inevitable embarrassment?
Men: 72 percent said yes.
Women: 89 percent said yes.
by CNB