
                         Roanoke Times
                 Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: SATURDAY, October 8, 1994                   TAG: 9410280036
SECTION: EXTRA                    PAGE: 12   EDITION: METRO 
SOURCE: KATHERINE REED STAFF WRITER
DATELINE:                                 LENGTH: Medium

`ONLY YOU' IS A CONVOLUTED MESS

Lucky thing Marisa Tomei has an Oscar on her mantle, or one might be tempted to feel sorry for her. In the new Norman Jewison film, "Only You," she utters the following line:

"I was born to kiss you."

Actually, Tomei deserves no sympathy for her annoyingly lightweight performance in this annoyingly lightweight romantic comedy; she seems to have had Audrey Hepburn in "Roman Holiday" in mind, but only got the princessy part right.

Tomei plays Faith, a self-absorbed English teacher who chases her romantic destiny to Italy - just 10 days before she is to be married to a podiatrist named Dwayne. She's trying on her future mother-in-law's wedding dress and veil when the phone rings and it's ... it's DAMON BRADLEY!!!

Damon Bradley is the name that the Ouija board produced when Faith, at age 11, and her brother asked it to name the man of Faith's dreams. It is also - coincidentally? - the name that a carnival fortuneteller came up with when Faith, still a girl, paid $2 to know her destiny (only the good parts).

So, when the actual Damon, a friend of Dwayne's, calls, Faith rushes out the door in the wedding dress and goes straight to the airport to track him down. Somehow Marlo Thomas in "That Girl" leaps to mind, and it is not a pleasant memory.

She just misses Damon, whose plane has just taken off for Venice (the near-misses continue for some time), but talks her seemingly level-headed sister-in-law Kate (Bonnie Hunt) into coming to the airport with passports and luggage so they can do what's logical: chase Damon Bradley to Italy.

That night, in Venice, Faith literally chases Damon through the streets of Venice, loses a shoe in the cobblestones and is returning dejectedly to Kate, when the man who has been chasing Faith to return her lovely, lost slipper finally manages to catch up with her. (Pause for breath.)

As Faith stands there weeping, Kate tells the man (Robert Downey Jr.) that Faith is on a wild-goose chase to find the man of her destiny. The man asks Faith, with whom he has obviously, mysteriously fallen in love, to at least tell him the guy's name so he can help her find him.

Damon Bradley, she tells him.

Well, guess what?

Damon and Faith have a lovely evening in Venice, fulfilling destiny. There's just one small problem (get ready, here comes a plot giveaway): he's NOT Damon Bradley! He's Peter Wright (Mr. Right?) a shoe salesman. Neither is the next guy who claims to be Damon Bradley!

Yes, the locations in Italy are breathtaking, and there are a couple of decent performances. Bonnie Hunt (of the "Beethoven" movies) is a breath of fresh air, but you wish her Kate would have Faith committed to a mental institution. And Downey is, as always, manic and interesting.

But with a story this stupid and cynical, not a thing in the world could save this film from its destiny, or what one wishes for it: complete obscurity.

Only you

A Tristar Pictures release, showing at the Salem Valley 8. 114 minutes. Rated PG for adult (so-to-speak) themes.

by CNB