Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: MONDAY, October 10, 1994 TAG: 9410110003
SECTION: EDITORIAL PAGE: A-6 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE:
DATELINE: LENGTH: Long
I'd like to address her statement, ``Americans believe that people should marry for love and only stay married as long as there is love.'' Therein lies one of our major problems.
I don't know what Webster says, but ``love'' should be a verb and not a noun. ``Love'' is something you do, not something you fall into, fall out of, or just happen to ``find.''
Looking to ``see'' if there's love in your relationship in order to determine whether to stay married or not is a sure way to doom a relationship. You either choose to love or not to love someone. Loving means acting and relating in ways that involve give and take on both sides. Statements like ``we grew apart,'' ``we fell out of love,'' or ``love wasn't in the relationship anymore'' are cop-outs for one or both partners who consciously choose to stop loving.
Divorce is too easy, too common and too bad. I believe divorce is a legitimate option in marriages where there is abuse - physical or emotional - and adultery, but only after concerted effort has been made to eliminate the behavior through the hard work of therapy. If the behavior can't be eliminated, ending the relationship is probably the only alternative. But that doesn't mean something called ``love'' left the relationship.
ROGER D. DALTON
ROANOKE
To render the nation less strange
OUR GOVERNMENT has undertaken to feed, clothe and provide free medical care for all Haitians, while millions of American taxpayers struggle to pay for it, when they don't have the same.
The Clinton administration is trying to take away the right of honest American citizens to protect themselves, their families, homes and businesses, while criminals run the street with any weapon they want.
We grant medical colleges millions of dollars a year to produce life in a test tube, while subsidizing abortion.
Strange!
This list could go on forever, and I'm sure each reader could make one of their own. My point is: Have you noticed that we have a very strange and costly government?
I know one person isn't going to change the world; however, I believe a vote for Oliver North is a step in the right direction.
GEORGE W. BUSH SR.
ROANOKE
A sign of fearful times
WE'RE writing about seven colorful billboards on display during September in the Roanoke area. Against a bright rainbow background they read, ``Celebrate Diversity'' and in smaller letters, ``Gay and Straight Citizens of the Roanoke Valley.''
These billboards are part of a campaign for civility spearheaded by the Committee for Lesbian and Gay Concerns with help from the Metropolitan Community Church; parents, families and friends of lesbians and gays; and the Welcoming Congregation Group of the Unitarian-Universalist Church of Roanoke - a combination of gay and gay-friendly area citizens.
We're proud of the basic message. We believe area residents diverse in race, religion, ethnicity, gender, age, physical ability and sexual orientation will enrich our community, are talented and good citizens, have earned our respect and deserve fair treatment.
Unfortunately, someone chose to spray-paint one of our billboards with large letters ``Kill fags.'' If this was a joke, it wasn't funny. If it was intended seriously, the perpetrator is playing a dangerous game. Is this not a democracy where minorities are to be respected and protected? Are we little better than Third World countries where minorities are fair game for killing? Do Roanoke Valley residents condone this behavior?
Gay bashing, even murder, has increased dramatically in recent years, especially where the radical right has persistently played up fears and hate of homosexuality. In many parts of the world, wars are fought in the name of religion. Let's not permit prejudices or religious views to set us against one another here.
Wouldn't it be beautiful if the whole world could learn just one thing - it's OK to be different? Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could all work together - all religions, right, left and center - to reduce the world's real abominations: hunger, poverty, war and genocide? Wouldn't it be great if we could, indeed, celebrate diversity?
JOHN and MARY BOENKE
HARDY
The tears weren't pretend
FOR ALL who love to fight and want to pick up guns and kill, take a good look at the photograph on the front page of the Sept. 22 newspaper. These tears are real. It's not a movie. It's not TV. It's not pretend. It's reality, and it's yours.
Look at the tears of a child. Think about it the next time you want to fight, the next time you clean your pistol, the next time you want to resist a police officer, rob a store or hurt someone. You'd be better off to cut off your own hand than to keep it and cause these tears with it.
Forgiveness measures the love we have for one another. It would be better for us to forgive than to cause this kind of hurt in a child. Now is a good time to start forgiving, stop hurting and begin healing.
MARSHALL TACKETT
BUCHANAN
Buffaloes don't compute
REGARDING the Sept. 22 front-page article entitled, ``Indians rejoice at hopeful beacon: a white buffalo'':
The reported odds for the birth of a white buffalo are somewhere in the range of one in 6 billion. There have been two documented white buffalo births in this century: Big Medicine in 1923 and Miracle in 1994.
Therefore, for the odds to be correct, there must have been 12 billion buffaloes (give or take a few) born in this century. I saw about 50 during a visit to a Boy Scout ranch in New Mexico in 1965. Where were/are the other 11,999,999,950?
EDWARD D. SPEAR
BEDFORD
There are good young people
I WOULD like to thank you for the Sept. 22 news article, ``Students harness prayer power.'' It was so nice to read something good about our young people for a change. We seem to hear all the bad things, but not much of the good ones. There are a lot of good young people out there, so let's hear more about them.
I commend young people who take their stand for God. May they know they have their rights just as the anti-Christians do.
When it seems our country is going to hell in a hand basket (as my mother use to say), it's comforting to know there are Christian young people growing up to run our country. Hopefully, they'll do a much better job than we're doing.
DORIS TOLLEY
LEXINGTON
Prisons filled with dropouts
I'M WRITING to voice my concern about Gov. Allen's plan, now approved by the legislature, to embark on a multibillion dollar prison building project most likely at the expense of higher education (and probably all education including kindergarten through 12th grade) in Virginia.
It appears the administration is convinced that locking up offenders for long periods of time will solve (or at least reduce) our crime problem. Let me quote a statistic: Twenty years ago, 82 percent of the U.S. prison population was high-school dropouts; the same is true today. So the past 20 years, as we've built more and more prisons, we still filled our prisons (which are supposed to be correctional facilities) in large numbers with high-school dropouts. Why do we have so many high-school dropouts, and why are such a large number of them ending up in prisons?
SAIFUR RAHMAN
BLACKSBURG
The choice is clear
THE DAYS of rhetoric are rapidly dwindling, and it will soon be decision time for Virginians relative to the U.S. Senate seat now occupied by Sen. Charles Robb. That decision should be comparatively easy. If you believe our country is being led in the right direction by Bill Clinton, the incumbent is your choice. He supports the president without reservation. On the other hand, if you're convinced the nation would be better off going in another direction, Oliver North should be given the opportunity to serve.
BYRON A. MULLEN
ROANOKE
by CNB