Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: THURSDAY, November 3, 1994 TAG: 9411030051
SECTION: EDITORIAL PAGE: A-13 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: ELI HECHT
DATELINE: LENGTH: Long
When a book is a best seller for 67 weeks you take notice. The book, ``Embraced by the Light,'' is a compilation of near-death and out-of-body experiences. A second book, ``Men Are From Mars and Women Are From Venus,'' has been a best-seller for 36 weeks. The book claims to help men and woman improve their relationships.
As a rabbi, I wonder what possesses the minds of my fellow Americans to read such books.
A common denominator of both books can be man's search for a better life. Whether alive or dead, things have to get better. So the search is on.
There is a famous story of a poor man, Zalman. He lived in a poor town. His home consisted of one large room. There he would fix shoes, eat and sleep. During the winter, the frail home would offer a bit of shelter, and most of the time his family would go hungry.
One night Zalman had a dream. His luck was going to change. There was a treasure hidden on the north side of the big city's bridge foundation.
The very next morning, Zalman left town on his adventure. After traveling many weeks, he came to the main city where the bridge was. As he got closer and closer to the bridge, he became very excited. Soon he would be a rich man. However, to his great disappointment, there was a major obstacle.
The bridge connected two sides of the city. In order to use the bridge, one would have to show his passport to a guard standing at the bridge. The guard would walk to and fro on the bridge from one end to the other. How in the world was Zalman going to dig at the foundation of the bridge if the guard was there? Poor Zalman! He did not know what to do, that is, until he hit on the following plan. Every time the guard would walk away from the end of the bridge, he would run and dig a few inches.
After a few attempts the guard caught him and demanded an explanation for the digging. Zalman had no choice but to tell him of his dream.
The guard laughed and said, ``If you follow dreams, you never get anywhere. Just last night I dreamt that a poor man named Zalman has a treasure under his fireplace. Do you think I am looking for Zalman? Of course not!''
Zalman quickly agreed and ran most of the way home. When he arrived at his home he quickly dug under the fireplace and found the treasure.
So it is with us. We search all over the world for a way to cope with our lives. In the end, the answer was within ourselves. We have had it all along. The message of both books is: If we want, we can do anything better, especially if God gives us a second chance.
I believe we may have forgotten that we already have the very best seller, the Bible, and it's been produced and printed in all 70 languages.
Have you ever looked all over your house for your car keys and at the last moment of panic you find the keys in your pocket. I believe something like that happens when we look for guidance and instruction. First, we go to the bookstore and buy a handful of books from the best-seller list and some self-help books.
We think that we will find the quick answer. After all, living in a world where we can get everything instantly, why not expect the same from reading a book? We have instant dinners, instant coffee, instant replay, instant money machines. Now we have instant aggravation, so why not instant answers.
Sad to note, with all that technology, we still are searching for happiness. It seems that we just can't find it.
Sometimes I wonder what our founding fathers meant when they declared that Americans are guaranteed the pursuit of happiness. May I emphasize that they stated the pursuit and not happiness itself.
One of the ways we can achieve happiness is with observing a religion. The Judeo-Christian religion speaks of Abraham and Sarah. The Bible records their dealing with one another. To me, they are the classic model of married life.
In the Bible we are told the following incident. God tells Abraham and Sarah that they will have a child, and Sarah laughs. When Abraham asked his wife Sarah why she laughed, Sarah answered, ``I did not.'' Her husband knew differently but he held his peace and corrected her, saying, ``Yes, you did,'' and stopped there. There were no more discussions or arguments. Abraham rationalizes Sarah's feelings as understandable. He is 100 years old and his wife was 90 years old.
He did not seek out a marriage counselor nor did he walk out of the marriage. It didn't matter to him if she would think of him as a ``man from Mars'' or if she was a ``woman from Venus.'' Sarah spoke her mind and subsequently God rewarded them with a son, Isaac. There we have examples of spousal communicating.
The Jewish philosophers and teachers tell of Isaac on the altar, his being offered by his father and having an out-of-body, near-death experience. Isaac was frightened to death. He saw his father raise the knife. His pure soul left his body and experienced a spiritual level of sacrifice and then was told to return to his body and marry. Go and create the Hebrew nation.
This story teaches us that Isaac really respected his father. Isaac knew that he had a father and a mother who loved him.
There is no discussion of child abuse or repressed memories. Certain things will happen in life whether we like it or not. The main lesson is to move forward and not look for excuses for failure.
The Bible tells it all: the story of a favorite son; Joseph; the jealousy of his brothers; the misery of enslavement; the laws of matrimony; and finally the 10 Commandments, including guidelines for clean living.
There is no censorship in the Bible. All stories are told in complete, humanistic terms with true lessons and help for ``keeping it together.''
So, my fellow searching-friends, those tormented with their search, don't look for the answers in the new best-sellers. Look into yourself and remember you can do it all. Just read the original best seller, the Bible!
Eli Hecht is a rabbi and director of Chabad of South Bay in Lomita, Calif. He wrote this commentary for the Long Beach (Calif.) Press-Telegram.
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