Roanoke Times
                 Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: MONDAY, December 19, 1994                   TAG: 9412210042
SECTION: EXTRA                    PAGE: 1   EDITION: METRO 
SOURCE: BEN BEAGLE
DATELINE:                                 LENGTH: Medium

PEASANTS LEERY OF YE OLDE TAX CUT

And it came to pass that the peasants rose up in the voting places and overthrew the ruling lords and ladies in the Golden City by the Great River - showing they had had enough dumb stuff from the former lords and ladies. At least, that is the way the wise men saweth it.

And the peasants puffed themselves up and waxed exceeding smart-mouthed. They saideth around their turf fires: "Yea, have we notteth shown we can wax exceeding wroth and throweth the rascals out? We are the true leaders of this land. The lords and ladies merely doeth our bidding." (Which is what the lords and ladies wanted them to believe.)

But then from the South came a white-haired lord from the winning side who began to sayeth things that made many of the peasants wonder what they had wrought.

"Yea, verily," they saideth among themselves. "Willeth out children now languish in orphanages, to be fed on gruel and never to know the warmth of turf fires of their own?"

And they saideth: "And what of the rumors we hear of the Great Quayle becoming the highest prince in all the land ?"

And the peasants tore their garments and threw ashes into their hair.

Meanwhile, the highest prince in the land at the moment, who lived in the Great House of White and ran about in funny-looking shorts every morning, was exceeding vexed by members of his court. One of these attendants was exiled for saying things that did not exactly fitteth in with family values.

And the lords and ladies on both sides saw that the peasants were restless. And both the losers and winners said in their councils: "This unrest is dangerous. We must thinketh of something to ease this troubling of their minds."

And both sides began to say that the peasants deserved a tax cut - for the ancient annals said that there is nothing a peasant coveteth more than ye olde tax cut.

And even the prince in the Great House of White came up with a tax cut suggestion. And all of them said their cuts were the best.

But the peasants seem unimpressed. They didn't seemeth to care. The lords and ladies and the prince from the Great House of White didn't understand why the peasants reacted this way.

A wise man among them putteth it in this fashion: "Those who offereth a tax cut are usually just fooling with your head."