Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: SATURDAY, February 11, 1995 TAG: 9502140030
SECTION: VIRGINIA PAGE: C-1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: ROBERT LITTLE STAFF WRITER
DATELINE: RICHMOND LENGTH: Medium
It's not dead, really. It never was alive.
OK, it was alive, but it never really was the state snake. And now it probably never will be.
It seems the state Senate is a mite serious for such slippery, small-time silliness.
A measure that would have made the timber rattlesnake ``the official reptile of the commonwealth'' was bagged, tagged and fricasseed by the legislature Friday.
``I'm terrified of those things,'' barked Senate Majority Leader and resident sourpuss Hunter Andrews of Hampton.
He called the measure ``a ridiculous bill - probably the worst one put in.''
Andrews, like several of his colleagues, refused to formally honor any animal ``admonished to crawl around on its belly.''
``There are enough snakes walking around upright here,'' he testified. ``We do not need to get down slithering and sliming on our bellies.''
House Bill 1889 was a simple one. It merely designated the timber rattlesnake - that one on the ``Don't Tread On Me'' flag and many others - as the state's official reptile.
``And this is a very serious bill,'' deadpanned sponsor Charles Waddell, to a chorus of fricative harrumphs.
Actually, the Loudoun County Democrat has no soft spot for serpents; he just supported the bill on behalf of some constituents. A group of home-schooled kids made the bill the goal of their joint biology/civics lesson.
Sen. John Chichester, R-Fredericksburg, began Friday's debate, trying to amend the bill to make a winding highway the official state snake. Then he changed his mind.
Sen. Charles Hawkins, R-Chatham, proposed the toad as the official state amphibian. ``We kiss a lot of those,'' he said.
Waddell sounded serious in his support of the measure: the timber rattler has a long, proud, squiggly history in the state, he said.
Lawmakers were amused, but not enough to make the thing law.
They didn't actually kill the bill; they sent it back to the Senate General Laws Committee.
(Of course, privately they say they did that just to keep the kids' hopes alive. In reality, it's as dead as a diamondback in the crosshairs).
And for Andrews, who prides himself in running an orderly chamber, dead was just the way he wanted it.
``If I come across something like those things, I just run,'' Andrews said. Then he made his thumb and finger into a pistol and pointed at the ground.
``And I am pleased to say that my wife is a good shot.''
Keywords:
GENERAL ASSEMBLY 1995
by CNB