Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: THURSDAY, March 2, 1995 TAG: 9503040038
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: 1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: BETH MACY
DATELINE: LENGTH: Long
``Big Foot is good, but a furry suit would've had gum stuck to it,'' says the practical, 28-year-old father of two.
``Basically I eliminated anything that could be tugged on, yanked off or pulled on. Anything that's accessible, my 2-year-old will find it.''
Nichols, a maintenance worker who's studied art at William Fleming High School and Virginia Western Community College, knocked one over the fence with his concept of The Baseball Nut - a pecan/walnut hybrid featuring free-flailing arms and legs, and an oversized, stuck-to-the-nut baseball cap with the Avalanche logo.
Like a line drive down the middle, it poked through the massive line-up of St. Bernards, which is what at least 50 people picked to replace the old Bucs' fanny flapper, Long Ball Silver.
Sliding into third place was the Yeti/Big Foot/Sasquatch/Abominable Snowman prototype. Or, as Roanoker David N. Bethel proposed, a ``Rocky the Snowman'' that hurls snowballs (pre-made with snow-cone ice) at the crowd every time a Salem player hits a homer. Its theme song: Bill Conti's immortal ``Gonna Fly Now,'' from the baby-boomer classic, ``Rocky.''
So, why the Nut?
Avalanche general manager Sam Lazzaro expounded on that issue with a rhetorical question of his own, ``What is the character of the nut?''
The conclusion he and his nine-member staff came to after sizing up the entries: ``The Nut gives you more liberty to be creative. ... We just thought the Nut was totally out there, way out there.''
Lazzaro also came up with another theory after fielding the scores of entries, many of which included elaborate drawings and suggestions for skits: Southwest Virginians love Salem baseball, and they love to draw.
``We were absolutely blown away by the response,'' he says. ``We were overwhelmed at how artistic people were - to think they put the time into something as zany as this!''
And speaking of zany, nutty ideas:
That wacky St. Bernard. Ken Paxton of Christiansburg carried out the dog shtick this way: The stadium could have a special Dog Pound, where the most loyal fans would sit, barking at appropriate times. When the umpire makes a bad call, the St. Bernard mascot would turn into a seeing-eye dog.
One Salem mother suggested hiding a ball under a seat in the stadium, and have "Bernard" seek it out, with the winner receiving a prize. Or, the team could feature a missing key player or coach, and have Bernard sniff him out, tracking him down to the theme from ``Rocky.''
Marc Patrouch's version of the St. Bernard, whom he calls Butch, would run out to give players a drink from his keg. His theme song would be John Foley's ``Centerfield.''
Lee Osborne of Roanoke suggested naming the dog "Long Ball Wally (a name I always associate with big dogs somehow), and my personal favorite, Rescue Rover (evoking the Valley's historical connection to the rescue theme),'' she wrote.
Covington's Monica Wood came up with a banner name, too: ``Babe Roof.''
And Mike Likens of Salem suggested two theme songs - Elvis Presley's ``You Ain't Nothing But a Hound Dog'' and a ``Swiss `oomph-bah' style song.''
Lest his name fail to appear in this newspaper on a daily basis, restaurateur Roland ``Spanky'' Macher sent us a Xerox of ``Dinocow,'' a treacherously horned bovine who is also featured - where else? - on Macher's Star City Diner logo.
Two art teachers turned Make-a-Mascot into a class project. Among Sindi Jones' Patrick Henry High School students' entries, my favorite was ``Ignious Pete,'' who looks remarkably like the Nut.
``He's a rock, not a spud,'' wrote the 11th-grade artist. ``He hands out `Pop Rocks!' through the duration of the game. He listens to rock 'n' roll. He drinks Rocky Top soda. He eats Rocky Road ice cream. He likes to watch the Rock 'n' Jock softball games on MTV. He lives in Rocky Top Tennessee. And his family's from Rocky Mount.''
``RAM-BO KNOWS,'' a large-horned ram who's a dead-ringer for television's ``Alf,'' was the brainchild of Bob Hody, a runner-up in the contest. Suggested shticks included head-butting (especially umpires), kicking a huge fake boulder around the field, climbing on the other team's dug-out to tap dance, and taking batting practice with a huge bat and fake rocks (Nerf-basketball sized).
Blacksburg's Joni Pienkowski took time away from her serious art to come up with The Salem Babe, a female mascot who pays homage to Babe Ruth while munching on a Baby Ruth candy bar.
``Most everybody likes candy, and most everybody likes scat humor (this candy bar looks like a turd), especially kids under 13, and men over [Pienkowski left a blank space here]. So when they lose, ya just say the Babes got FLUSHED.''
In the kid category, Jon Blankenship submitted my personal favorite, a Coneheadlike icicle-combination-time bomb named Boomer. He printed his explanation this way, spelling errors and all: ``A snow mountain with a time bome on it. showing the start of an avLanche. It has purple boots with black tighte and Black sleeves.''
Carissa Joy Taylor proposed a mountain goat named Rocky with optional udders and the jersey No. 14 (her dad's team number). Says Taylor: ``I am 17 years old ... I go to Northside High. ... I love Art! And I love Brent, who loves baseball more than life itself.''
Eight-year-old Mary Beth Brown also drew a goat and named him Yodel. ``On snowy mountains people would yodel to each other to find one another. ... Yodel's theme song is from the puppet show in the `Sound of Music.' The song goes: `High on a hill was a lonely goat - Heard La-De-O La-De-O La-Hee-Ho!' When the man comes up to bat, everyone could yodel.''
And 10-year-old Nathan Anderson submitted a ferocious ``polar bear with attitude,'' named Mogul the Mauler with this P.S.: ``Moguls are bumps on ski slopes.''
Kendall Weddle of Christiansburg gave Bigfoot a hillbilly twist by making him barefoot and giving him the theme song ``Foggy Mountain Breakdown.'' Suggested names: Bumbles and Homer.
And Paul C. Stubbs of Ripplemead didn't send a drawing, but did offer his services, based on a background of having played Scobby Doo at Kings Dominion several years ago.
By the way, would-be mascots are already inquiring about auditions for the Baseball Nut. Though the costume is still being designed, Lazzaro is fielding calls for try-outs at 389-3333.
Meanwhile, Nichols can't wait to see his winning drawing spring to life.
Asked if he'd audition for the part, he said, ``I can try it! I was thinking [the Nut should be] borderline psychotic when I drew it, so we're a pretty good match.''
Beth Macy is a features department staff writer and Thursday columnist who hopes the new Salem baseball stadium will have as much charm - and outdoor-bar ambiance - as the old one did.
by CNB