Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: MONDAY, March 20, 1995 TAG: 9503210018
SECTION: NEWSFUN PAGE: NF1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: NANCY GLEINER STAFF WRITER
DATELINE: LENGTH: Long
When we had a fight, we'd tear leaves off the bushes in front of my grandfather's house and throw them at each other (we really didn't want to hurt each other, I guess) and not speak to each other for a very long time (sometimes for a whole afternoon).
When I moved to another town about 15 miles away, Lee and I knew we would still be best friends forever. But our visits grew farther and farther apart and then we never saw each other at all. We each made new best friends.
Nine years later, Lee moved to my town, but we only saw each other in the halls at school. We hardly even knew each other then, but neither of us ever forgot ...
Do you remember how you met your best friend? Do you remember what you first liked about him or her?
Best friends come in all shapes and sizes, and you soon find out that shape and size is not very important in friendship.
What is important is sharing, having fun together and your actions toward each other. More than anything else, the letters you wrote to NewsFun said you liked your friends because they were nice.
John Vanhoy of Hillsville likes James Davis because he is caring. Stephanie Bradshaw of Salem wrote that Caryl Humphrey is special to her because ``if I get hurt, she's right there with me.'' Darnell Miller of Blacksburg's friend Justin is ``not mean or selfish.''
``The one thing I most like about my best friends is that they are very kind to me and other people. They are caring and considerate to everyone,'' Owen Highfill of Roanoke County wrote.
Two of the most important body parts a friend has are his or her ears. Being a good friend means knowing when to listen. Sometimes it means being quiet and listening even before your friend asks you to.
``Daniel Hill has been a friend to many people, but he always has time to listen to me,'' Joseph Reed of Fancy Hill wrote.
``The unique thing about my best friend, Katie Huffman, is that she listens to everything I have to say, even if I'm talking about something boring,'' wrote Serena Powell of Natural Bridge.
A pal is someone you can share your secrets with, someone you know won't tell them to anyone else.
What Kelly Baumgarner of Lexington likes most about her best friend is ``that I can tell her anything and don't have to worry about her telling anybody, even when we fight.''
It's easier to be friends when you see each other a lot, but sometimes best friends live far away. They might have lived near you and moved away or you might have met them away from home.
When Samantha B. of Buena Vista's best friend moved to Richmond, Samantha ``cried for a couple of weeks. I still wish she was here, but it doesn't bother me as much as it used to,'' she wrote.
Katie Schweitzer of Salem's best friend, Brittany, who's also her cousin, lives in Indiana. They only see each other twice a year, but they keep in touch in between. Mikey Auxer of Speedwell has a best friend who lives in Pennsylvania.
Best friends also can be relatives, and they may not be the same age that you are. Two of my sisters are now two of my best friends, but they certainly weren't when we were growing up. One is three years older than me, the other is 10 years younger. I shared a room with my older sister - I drove her crazy because my side of the room was always messy - and we didn't become best friends until we were adults.
Even though we're very different (she's still much neater than I am), it doesn't matter now. Lee Chichester of Roanoke is really different from her best friend because James, obviously, is a boy. Lee said that makes them special friends. And she's learned to do things she might not have if James had been a Jane. ``Before I met James I never played with Legos or even drew a truck.''
Amanda Reynolds of Glasgow has a furry best best friend - her cat - along with a best human friend. ``My cat's very affectionate, loves to watch TV, like me, and likes all the same foods as me. Corny, isn't it?''
Caitlyn Rancourt of Blacksburg doesn't think it's a good idea to have a best friend. ``It hurts others feelings not to be your best friend. But I do have a lot of friends.''
``I found that having a best friend leaves a lot of people out, so I decided to have a lot of friends and no favorites,'' wrote Jacob Leech from Rockbridge County. ``It's a lot easier that way.''
``I don't think it's fair to single people out; I think it's better to have a small group than one best friend,'' wrote Mayumi Smitlea of Lexington. ``For each of my special interests or needs I have a friend who I can trust.''
Some kids don't have a lot of friends or even a best friend. It might be their fault because they're not nice or kind or fun to be with. Sometimes, though, no one wants to be their friend because of the way they look or talk or because they do weird things.
Some kids brag or exaggerate about what they have or what they can do because they want people to be their friends. It makes them sad to see other kids being with their friends. Maybe there's something you don't know about that boy or girl that you might like. It might be worth a try.
Remember what Forrest Gump said about the box of chocolates?
We like friends sometimes because we admire a quality they have.
``What I like about my friend Katie Huffman is that she always has a positive attitude,'' wrote Carrie Ayers of Lexington.
Thomas Collins, from Natural Bridge Station, admires trust and kindness in a friend. Adam Zel of Lexington admires his friends' honesty and that ``you can always talk to them when you have a problem.''
``My best friend never gives up on things till he learns it,'' wrote Kevin Board of Rocky Mount.
Some friends last a lifetime, others are around for just a short while. We take from them and give to them. We share our toys and our secrets. We laugh and cry together. Some come and some go.
Many years after we graduated from high school, Lee and I saw each other again at a reunion. The first words she said to me were, ``You're the reason I came here.''
We laughed about the potatoes and the leaf fights and the grasshoppers. We hadn't forgotten.
by CNB