Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: THURSDAY, May 4, 1995 TAG: 9505040055
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: 1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: BETH MACY
DATELINE: LENGTH: Medium
I believe it consumes us, turning us into passive clumps of putty and curtailing our natural drive for conversation, creativity, curiosity and productive movement of all kinds, from washing the supper dishes to having sex.
That said, I have to admit that I'm dying to know whether stroke-sufferer John finally realized Mamie was more than just the maid, and if Victoria slept with Brad, and what kind of evil conniving moves trickster Phyllis pulled on goody-two-pumps Cricket this week.
I'm talking about the latest plot maneuvers on "The Young & The Restless," which I have not watched in a week in honor of National TV-Turnoff Week. My husband, in a show of solidarity - and because he knows how I sweat for column ideas - even agreed to forego "NYPD Blue" last week, which turned out to be no big sacrifice since it wasn't even on.
I was inspired to unplug the tube during a recent visit to Charlotte, N.C., where we went to reconnect with a friend and former housemate I hadn't seen in five years. I wish I could report that we spent hours talking about our kids and our jobs and laughing about all the 3 a.m. Skyline Chili stops we used to make on the way home from questionable venues.
But the fact is, I know my friend's 10-year-old stepdaughter better than I know him. I know she's on the verge of puberty, which song she's singing in the middle-school talent show next week, how to pull my hair into a topsy-tail (she taught me) and her favorite color (pink).
I learned all this from talking to her, from playing basketball with her, from taking her to the nearby mall, where she was old enough to consider buying real makeup but young enough to opt for the play stuff at Kay-Bee Toys instead.
As for the changes in my friend's life, I know he likes "Law & Order," "ER," "Seinfeld," "Homicide" and "Friends."
I know his two toddler boys have seen "The Lion King" more than 50 times, that he has more cable channels than I have pairs of shoes, and that back-to-back "Andy Griffith" re-runs are a North Carolina staple.
I know my friend's large-screen TV intimately, but sadly, I no longer know him.
The American Medical Association reports that a typical child witnesses 8,000 murders on television by the time he finishes elementary school. By the time he graduates from high school, he will have spent more time watching TV than in school.
Those are the numbers. They are as black-and-white as my old 13-inch RCA, and they are equally as mind-numbing.
Eight-thousand murders - that's the Oklahoma City death toll 60 times over.
Have our children seen so many deaths on prime time that when reality strikes - in Oklahoma, in the middle of the day - it seems distant and unreal?
"It was like Beirut," the newspaper headlines blared. But would our children have titled the story, "It was like Terminator II"?
Or did they even read the story? Did they simply click it on the screen, surfing between Oklahoma's real tragedy and Hollywood's endless Tragedy Lites?
Originally intended to connect us with the world, TV is disconnecting us from our neighbors and families, slowly and insidiously desensitizing us from the real world.
If that sounds too preachy, well, amen and I'm sorry. But I think it's a prayer worth practicing.
I didn't solve the problems of the world during my weeklong TV boycott. But I did finally get the first coat of paint on my kitchen walls one night, and I read 47 pages into Josephine Humphreys' latest novel on another.
I'm bummed I missed "Seinfeld," which was funny, I'm told. (My husband confessed that he cheated and watched it Thursday night while I was gone.) And you can bet I'm going to check the weekly "Soap Wrap-up" in Saturday's "Spectator" to see if Phyllis finally put the kibosh on Cricket.
"Y&R" is a dumb show, I know, but I've watched the thing for 20 years. I'd hate to think how many hours I've wasted on it - enough, certainly, to have completed a doctoral thesis on the sheer twaddle of it.
And definitely enough to figure out that all the action occurs on Mondays and Fridays, which are the days I'll limit myself to under my new viewing strategy. It's a start anyway.
Who knows? By the time John remembers how much he loves Mamie, maybe the kitchen will be painted.
Beth Macy etc. is a feature writer and Thursday columnist. If you have suggestions for columns or stories, you can call her at 981-3435, or write P.O. Box 2491, Roanoke, Va., 24010.
by CNB