Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: MONDAY, October 23, 1995 TAG: 9510250016
SECTION: NEWSFUN PAGE: NF-1 EDITION: METRO COLOR.
SOURCE: NANCY GLEINER STAFF WRITER
DATELINE: LENGTH: Long
``That's no way to treat a dog,'' the kind, gray-haired man said to her.
``That's the way my parents treat me. They say, `You're stupid, Beth.' And sometimes they pull my hair. If it's good enough for me, it's good enough for my dog,'' the girl said. ``Besides, it's none of your business. That's what my parents say to me, `It's nobody's business.'''
The girl wasn't real, but her problem was - and is.
Beth is a puppet used in a show, this day at Cave Spring Elementary School in Roanoke County, about abuse. Her dog, Lucky, was being physically abused. She was hurting him by tugging on his leash, not feeding him regularly and shouting at him and calling him names.
Lucky the Dog is so cute, a lot of the kids in the audience laughed when he appeared on the stage of the puppet theater. But what was happening to Lucky, and what happens to some pets and even to some children, is physical abuse and nothing to laugh at.
Jim Tucker is someone who often makes kids laugh. He's one of the performers in Puppets by Pizzazz. Tucker's group has tackled a serious subject in ``Something's Wrong at Lucky's House,'' a show being performed at some of the schools in the Roanoke Valley.
The Child Abuse Prevention Council of Roanoke Valley, a group that gives out information about ways to help children grow up safe and in helpful environments, hired Puppets by Pizzazz to write and perform the show about child abuse; it even paid to have the puppets made.
A dark-haired boy named John came onto the stage and told Tucker about his exciting birthday party. He had written about it in his private journal. All of his friends came to his party - except his used-to-be best friend, Josh.
John had a new jacket. When he left it on his chair at school, it disappeared. It turned up in Josh's desk. To make matters worse, Josh lied about taking the jacket.
``Josh's parents are separated and he has a lot of problems,'' John told Tucker, sadly. ``His parents don't have much time for him, either.''
John's a puppet, but his story could be real. Josh was being emotionally abused. His parents were neglecting him, he had no one to pay attention to him. He needed help.
John felt sorry for Josh and sorry that they weren't friends anymore. Tucker told John there were people John could go to who could help Josh - his teacher, guidance counselor, DARE officer or other adult he could trust.
```My friend is having a hard time,' you could say to an adult,'' Tucker told him. ```He needs some help.''' That's not tattling. It's caring about someone.
When friends are having problems, they sometimes show it in different ways - changing how they act, doing poorly in school, getting into trouble, doing things they didn't used to do. If you care about them, it's important to tell someone you trust, who might be able to help.
Emotional abuse hurts just as much as physical - it hurts inside.
Mrs. Price is a guidance counselor with bouncy silver hair and a wide smile. She has a happy life now - a wonderful family, a great job - but her life wasn't always good. When she was 10, an adult she knew touched her in a private place, a place that's covered by a bathing suit.
``It made me feel yucky and I was scared,'' Mrs. Price told Tucker.
Mrs. Price is also a puppet, but what she talked about happening to her as a child has happened to children in real life. It's called sexual abuse.
The adult who abused Mrs. Price made her think it was her fault. He even said he would hurt her if she told anyone, that it was their secret.
``Don't let anyone make you feel it's your fault,'' Tucker said. ``Tell someone and if they don't believe you, tell someone else until you find someone who believes you. Tell someone even if the abuser says he'll hurt you.''
The Child Abuse Prevention Council of the Roanoke Valley has these helpful ideas:
If someone hurts you or touches you in a way that gives you that uh-oh feeling ... say no (you may have to scream); get away (run!); tell someone (talk to someone you trust); it is not your fault (adults who hurt children are wrong - they know better and it is their fault - not yours).
If you or someone you know is living in danger because of abuse - physical, emotional or sexual - you need to tell a trusted adult. That can be an adult at school, a neighbor you know well, a minister or other religious leader, a police or DARE officer or a family friend.
``Everyone needs love and attention,'' Jim Tucker told the pupils. ``And they deserve it.''
As a child abuse prevention poster says, ``It shouldn't hurt to be a child.''
If you ever have a problem such as the ones talked about in the show and you can't find anyone to talk to, you can call the Child Abuse Prevention Council at 344-3579 or the Child Abuse Hotline, (800) 422-4453.
by CNB