ROANOKE TIMES
Copyright (c) 1996, Roanoke Times
DATE: Thursday, February 15, 1996 TAG: 9602150022
SECTION: NEIGHBORS PAGE: E-8 EDITION: METRO
When retired Lewis-Gale Hospital emergency room workers get together each month, their tales are as entertaining as anything on "ER" or "Chicago Hope."
Joyce Wilson started the banter at the January session by telling about the man who regularly faked a heart attack.
"He would grab his chest and fall down on the floor very gently, so as not to hurt himself. Sometimes we were so busy that we'd just step over him.
"One day when he came in to have his heart attack as usual, I told him to go in one of the side rooms and take off his clothes so the doctor could have a look at him.
"Meanwhile, this woman comes in to be looked at. Now, this man was real impatient - he always wanted immediate attention. So out he comes, while we're trying to deal with this woman, and all that man had on was his hat, his socks and an umbrella on his arm. That woman took one look at him and screamed ... "
The women listened attentively, even though they had heard the story many times.
"See how much fun we have?" said Georgia Wade, a nursing assistant for 14 years.
The former emergency room nurses and secretaries, who have made their monthly luncheon a tradition for nearly 18 years, developed a close bond while working together and say it's important for them to keep in touch.
"I do honestly believe that no one worked together better," declared Evelyn Adams, the emergency room receptionist for five years.
"We were a team - not just the nurses, but the secretaries as well. Lots of times there's such a turnover, but we've worked together for a long time," said Helen Ammen, who was a registered nurse for 15 years.
"This was the finest bunch of ladies I've ever known," Wilson said. "The doctors were considerate, too, and they had feeling hearts."
Wade and Wilson, the first of the group to retire, started meeting regularly for lunch and "... then as the other girls retired, they wanted to come, too," said Wade.
"We have a lot to talk about - things that happened when we were there and things that've happened since we left," she said.
The retirees aren't just sitting at home. In addition to their monthly get-togethers, Wade said, "it would take a book to write about" what she's been doing since she left the hospital. "Right now, I'm taking care of my grandson's house and his little dog."
Adams has been able to spend more time with her children and grandchildren and put together a lot of puzzles.
In addition, some members of the group have had to return to the hospital as patients. They said they've noticed many changes in hospital policies.
"Your sheets would only be changed once a week unless you said something. When we worked there, the sheets were changed every day," said Wade.
During the snowstorm in January, Wilson called the hospital to get medication, but the nurse wouldn't let her speak to the doctor on duty: "She said, 'That's not our policy.'''
The others raised their eyebrows.
Several retirees remarked that it could be fun to go back to work for a day. But not Nancy St.Clair, a registered nurse for 30 years who now travels with her husband.
"It wouldn't do for me to go back for a day - I'd get sued in 20 minutes," she said after hearing about Wilson's encounter with the new policies.
Mary Helvestine, a 30-year employee, was the RN supervisor for the emergency room. She and her sister, Millie Porterfield, a nurse for 20 years, attended the lunch together.
Porterfield told the story about an intern who couldn't control himself around women. "I felt sorry for his wife. One day he asked me to go away with him, and I said, 'Why don't you call and ask your wife about that?' and he said, 'My wife doesn't care. She packs my suitcase. She knows I have to get out a bit.'''
Jo Lambdon, who still works part time at the hospital, remembered competing for the opportunity to assist a doctor doing a pelvic exam of a transsexual, a woman who used to be a man.
The women also talked about working at Lewis-Gale when it was an old downtown hospital. Wilson recalled that the old waiting room took a lot of abuse from patients.
"Sometimes it would look like a speakeasy with popcorn and pop all over the floor. Patients would bring in their families and trash the place while they waited.
"One time this lady brought in her four children, and I put them all in a room to wait for the doctor. When I came back to check on them, those children had gotten hold of crayons and colored all over the wall.
"I nearly fainted. I said to them, 'You ought to be ashamed of yourself letting your children do that.' So I went and got a bucket and five rags and told them to clean it up. When I got back to the room, it was just as clean," Wilson said.
LENGTH: Medium: 92 lines ILLUSTRATION: PHOTO: Mary Helvestine (left), her sister, Millie Porterfieldby CNB(right) and Macy Hailey are among the former Lewis-Gale employees
who get together each month for lunch.