ROANOKE TIMES
Copyright (c) 1996, Roanoke Times
DATE: Sunday, June 16, 1996 TAG: 9606180010
SECTION: CURRENT PAGE: NRV-2 EDITION: NEW RIVER VALLEY
COLUMN: Dispatches from Rye Hollow
SOURCE: STEVE KARK
For weekend builders, perfection is overrated
Have you ever noticed how all those home-project manuals make perfection seem so simple and easy to achieve?
They generally have an attractive, full-color photo of the finished project on the cover. And often a group of neatly dressed people can be seen enjoying the benefits of the project.
Presumably, the amateur builder, the one who read the book and did the work, is included in this group. At least, that's the suggestion.
For instance, there's a picture of a gaggle of preppy fashion models on the cover of my guide to building your own deck.
The folks in the picture look as if they just stepped out of "Melrose Place," the TV show that made Heather Locklear a star. Not a hair out of place, nor a beer belly amongst them.
They're sipping iced tea and, by the looks on their faces, appear to be engaging in pleasant conversation; perhaps they're sharing their insights into the day's stock-market fluctuations.
No one seems to be gossiping. No one is telling a bad joke. No ash trays. No salt on the rims of the glasses. No crushed limes littering the perfect wood finish.
Who are these people?
They wouldn't know the difference between a ball peen or a claw hammer if their latest financial reports depended on it.
Like the people, the deck itself is perfect. No wear, no tear. The project appears skillfully assembled. It appears to be made out of fresh redwood boards and looks as if it were built yesterday.
Where are the cracked and uneven boards? the hammer dings? the bent nails? Where's the weathering? These are the very things that give a project most of its character. Who wants something that's perfect anyway?
The dinged and cracked board is closer to what one might expect in the real world. Unlike the dazzling stars of "Melrose Place," the rest of us lose our sheen at some point in our lives. We get dinged up. We weather.
So what? It builds character.
They ought to put real people on the covers of those how-to books. And they ought to show what the project really looks like when an amateur builds it.
They should show the average guy splayed out in a deck chair, drinking a cold beer as a reward for his efforts, flawed as they may be. They should have him grimy from the day's work, with his T-shirt hiked up over his protruding belly.
Maybe a few friends have stopped by now that the work is done. Pale and knock-kneed in their worn, blue-jean shorts, several have gathered near the edge of the deck to better assess its flaws.
Perfection is overrated anyway. It's all vanity. Who or what isn't flawed in some way? Those who learn to live with imperfection are better off because they've accepted that there's no fault in being normal.
Face it. We're living in the real world. You better get used to it.
Or you could always move to "Melrose Place.".
LENGTH: Medium: 60 linesby CNB