ROANOKE TIMES
Copyright (c) 1996, Roanoke Times
DATE: Thursday, June 20, 1996 TAG: 9606200083
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: 1 EDITION: METRO
Dear Krista,
How do I begin my graduation letter to you?
How do I tell you how proud I was when you graduated with honors from William Fleming High School last week? Or that, in your one-year internship with me at the newspaper, I've learned more from you than you have from me?
Like ``freshie'' - the word you used to describe our cute-boy waiter at our graduation lunch last week.
Like ``mad'' (cool), ``chill'' (hang out) and ``house'' (a verb, meaning to ``diss'' or one-up).
And, like, the fact that not all teen-agers fit the stereotype of being pregnant, or on drugs or engaging in violent crime.
It's been 14 years since I wore a cap and gown like you wore last week. Like you, I earned a small scholarship - and a federal Pell grant - to forge my way through college.
But there were a lot of bumps along the way. Potholes that could have turned to sinkholes, detours that could have left me lost.
I know you've already ridden your share of bumpy roads. I've watched you struggle with boyfriends who've tried to use you, with the pressure of doing ``the cool thing'' to keep up with your peers.
I've listened to you doubt yourself, and I've probably given more advice than you ever wanted, let alone asked for:
Should you take a year off before going to college? (An emphatic ``NO!'')
Is it normal to be so excited about the next few months that you can hardly sleep? (Absolutely.)
Is it typical to be a little scared? (Yes. To paraphrase my grandma, ``Be careful, be careful, be careful.'')
Will it be hard? (Yes. Everything that's worth anything is.)
I've mothered, doted over and nagged at you, Krista, not because your own mother doesn't; I know she does. But because I remember how, when my own mom spoke, my ears always seemed to be plugged.
And, mostly, because I remember - too well - what life was like 14 years ago, including all the signs, forks and roadblocks that lie ahead:
The blazing confidence one moment, the total insecurity the next;
The danger of trusting people too much, or not trusting them enough;
You'll also need to know that criticism never stops, but it doesn't have to stop you;
That an open, hungry mind is the key to creativity and happiness;
That passion is fleeting, but real friendship is forever;
That certain guys who have gorgeous eyes - but who fail to look you in your own - will share your path.
But they'll always - repeat, always - leave you stranded. And when they do, you'll realize that only your own sense of direction can save you.
Which is the one and only place to begin: With you, Krista.
Be true to yourself, your true self, and you'll never lose your way. It's the one thing I wish I knew 14 years ago. And the one thing I wish for you today - and tomorrow.
Tread strongly, my friend.
LENGTH: Medium: 62 linesby CNB