ROANOKE TIMES
Copyright (c) 1996, Roanoke Times
DATE: Friday, August 23, 1996 TAG: 9608230067
SECTION: VIRGINIA PAGE: B-1 EDITION: METRO
DATELINE: TAPPAHANNOCK
SOURCE: Associated Press
CHARGED WITH SLAYING his wife, John Upton remains in a Michigan prison without bond.
For more than a 25 years, John Upton was a revered public figure who coped quietly with private tragedy.
Just about everyone in this small town knew the gracious, mild-mannered community college president, but far fewer knew his wife. Fewer still knew that Kathleen Upton battled mental illness throughout their more than 30-year marriage, or that Upton took care of her by himself for much of their life together.
But everyone now knows what happened last month, when Upton called a 911 operator in Michigan to report his wife's body was on the porch of their summer cabin.
``She died at my hands,'' Upton said.
Upton, 64, is accused of beating, choking and stabbing his wife to death July 1. He then took an overdose of tranquilizers and muscle relaxers in an apparent suicide attempt.
``I don't know anyone in the community who was so well thought-of as Dr. Upton,'' said Patsy Harris, who owns a dress shop in the business district of this quiet Tidewater town.
``I never met his wife, never saw her that I know of. I didn't think too much about that until this,'' Harris said. ``I had a couple of friends tell me she wasn't well, but I didn't know why.''
Upton confided to close friends that his wife suffered from manic depression and took medication to control debilitating mood swings.
John Presley, dean of the college Upton founded 26 years ago and a close friend, said he believes Upton snapped under the complex pressures of loving and caring for a sick woman as he maintained a very public life.
``Dr. Upton's private life was very carefully separated from his public role at the college,'' Presley said. ``Remember, this is still a small, Southern place. That was just not discussed.''
Classes at Rappahannock Community College began this week without Upton. He remains in the Allegan County, Mich., jail despite pleas from a long list of prominent friends that he be released on bond.
In letters to the court, judges, a congressman and fellow educators attested to Upton's character, and family members detailed some of the private burden that caring for Kathleen Upton placed on her husband.
``Kathleen Upton was struck, beaten and killed,'' prosecutor Fred Anderson said at a bond hearing July 12. ``The fact that he is a pillar of the community doesn't change the charge here.''
Upton is charged with murder. A jury decides the degree of guilt. Michigan does not have capital punishment.
Friends say they see nothing unseemly in defending Upton, and note the couple's three children also support him.
``There is no monster here,'' Presley said. ``What can happen to any of us if the pressures become unbearable? You don't wipe out years of unselfish devotion to her and to other people.''
Kathleen Upton, 63, seldom attended school functions. Upton was extremely attentive when she appeared and paid eloquent tribute to her when she was absent, Presley and others said.
Kathleen Upton ate several times a week at the Rivahside Cafe, always ordering a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich and four deviled eggs, cafe owner Tim Beamer said.
``She was so friendly, smiling,'' Beamer said. Beamer and his wife treasure the Christmas cards Kathleen Upton sent each year, always with a warm and lengthy personal note.
But others sometimes saw a more disturbing picture.
Kathleen Upton's condition worsened last winter, and Upton took an abrupt two-month leave to care for her.
This summer, Kathleen Upton erected a fence across the beach at the family's Lake Michigan compound, and reportedly threatened her brother-in-law if he crossed it.
A distraught Upton told friends in Michigan that he knew she needed institutional care.
Upton reportedly planned to commit his wife after he returned to Virginia later in July.
In his rambling 25-minute call to the emergency operator, Upton said he bludgeoned his wife with a board because he had ``become exasperated over the constant demands.''
Over and over, Upton's friends and colleagues say how generous and kind he is, how concerned for the well-being of others.
Harris' three children all attended the community college campus in nearby Warsaw, and Upton remembered each one, she said. At her youngest son's graduation in May, Upton stepped out of the processional to greet her family.
``He was one of the nicest, gentlest, most caring men I have ever met,'' Harris said.
``I cannot equate that with this terrible crime, and especially the brutal way she died,'' Harris continued. ``The mind has a breaking point, and he evidently reached his. You think you know a person, but really you don't. You don't know what other people go through, or what they are capable of doing.''
LENGTH: Medium: 96 lines ILLUSTRATION: PHOTO: (headshot) Upton.by CNB