ROANOKE TIMES
Copyright (c) 1996, Roanoke Times
DATE: Sunday, December 15, 1996 TAG: 9612160002
SECTION: VIRGINIA PAGE: B-6 EDITION: METRO
COLUMN: Good Neighbors Fund
SOURCE: BETSY BIESENBACH STAFF WRITER
Melissa (not her real name) and her husband, Alan (not his real name), are very close. But in many ways the closeness is by necessity rather than choice.
Alan, 27, was in an accident six years ago that left him physically and emotionally disabled. Melissa, who is just 24, spends her days caring for him and their two small children.
It's a 24-hour-a-day job. Alan needs medications and must be watched constantly because his doctors think he might be suicidal.
Since his accident, Melissa said, he has been to 15 doctors in the Roanoke Valley. None of them has been able to pinpoint the cause of his severe joint pain, mood swings and insomnia, or the spasms that periodically wrack his entire body.
They've tried different medications, Melissa said, including Prozac, but that just made Alan sleepy and grumpy.
In desperation, the family decided to take him to the Johns Hopkins University research hospital in Baltimore. But because their only income is Alan's monthly $490 disability check and $210 in food stamps, there was no money for gasoline for the trip.
Melissa went to the Presbyterian Community Center for help. She had been there before for assistance with gas and electric bills.
The center's caseworkers screen applicants for the Roanoke Area Ministries' Emergency Financial Assistance program, which is supported by the Good Neighbors Fund. The fund is sponsored by the Roanoke Times.
The family received a grant and took the trip to Johns Hopkins, but came back no closer to a diagnosis. They were told that Alan had an emotional disorder brought on by nerve damage. His other psychological symptoms are probably caused by depression.
That "came on when he realized he wasn't going to go back to work," Melissa said.
Before the accident, Alan was a large, robust man. He loved his job as a truck driver and did a lot of heavy lifting. Now, Melissa said, his driving is restricted to an hour or so at a time, and he can't lift more than 5 pounds.
Life isn't easy for her, either. She began receiving Aid to Families with Dependent Children in November, but whether those benefits continue depends on Alan's doctor certifying that she must stay with him 24 hours a day.
Although she would like to go out and get a job, she can't until Alan gets better. When that will be is anybody's guess, she said.
He requires so much care and attention that when he's feeling bad, "it's tough just getting the kids off to school," she said. But "he's a good-hearted man," and that makes the work a little easier.
There is no money for Christmas this year, Melissa said, but the Presbyterian Community Center has found a church to provide the family with all the trimmings, and she has sewn some doll clothes for the children.
Despite her problems, Melissa seems to cope with them well.
"I just try to get through the day," she said. "I have a more positive attitude than most people."
Checks made payable to the Good Neighbors Fund should be mailed to The Roanoke Times, P.O. Box 1951, Roanoke 24008.
Names - but not donation amounts - of contributors will be listed. Those requesting that their names not be used will remain anonymous.
LENGTH: Medium: 65 linesby CNB