ROANOKE TIMES 
                      Copyright (c) 1997, Roanoke Times

DATE: Monday, February 3, 1997               TAG: 9702040009
SECTION: EDITORIAL                PAGE: A-5  EDITION: METRO 
COLUMN: MONTY S. LEITCH
SOURCE: MONTY S. LEITCH

FIGHTING FEBRUARY BLAHS, AND THE URGE TO KILL

"WHAT DO you want to do?"

"I don't know. What do you want to do?"

"We could watch some TV."

"Sure. What's on?"

"Uh. A Bette Davis movie. `The Andy Griffith Show.' Basketball."

"I don't care. Any ice-skating?"

"I thought you didn't care."

"It's just, today marks the anniversary of Dick Button's sixth U.S. victory in figure-skating, and it seems like we ought to note it somehow."

"You want to pay homage to Dick Button?"

"Well, I'd rather note his accomplishments than Dean Smith's."

"We don't have to watch basketball."

"I didn't say we did."

"So, then, what do you want to do?"

"I don't care. What do you want to do?"

"Well, if you don't want to watch TV, we could play Scrabble."

"Only if you promise not to cheat."

"I don't cheat!"

"You look up words in that Scrabble dictionary of yours. If that's not cheating, I don't know what is."

"I suppose you'd rather let me play words that aren't really words so you can call me on them and make me lose my turn. I supposed you'd rather that you cheated instead of me."

"OK. Drop it. Use your dictionary, I don't care."

"I don't want to play Scrabble anyway."

"But you brought it up!"

"Well, I changed my mind."

"Fine."

"Fine."

"So, what do you want to do? And don't say you don't care."

"Well, I don't care."

"You must care. You don't want to watch TV, and you don't want to play Scrabble ... "

"I'm perfectly willing to play Scrabble; it was you who said ... "

" ... so you make a suggestion this time."

"Fine. I'll make a suggestion."

"Fine."

"We could go shopping."

"Oh, fine."

"Or ... we could go to the movies."

"What movie?"

"I don't care. You pick."

"How about `Scream'?"

"What's that about?"

"Well, it's this horror movie about a bunch of kids ... "

"You don't mean endangered teen-agers, do you?"

"I don't know, just kids."

"A horror movie?"

"You said for me to pick!"

"Yes, but a horror movie."

"Oh, forget it. You go shopping, I'll watch TV."

"Fine."

"Fine."

Monty S. Leitch is a Roanoke Times columnist.

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