THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1994, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Friday, September 9, 1994 TAG: 9409080058
SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E11 EDITION: FINAL
TYPE: Teen [movie] review
SOURCE: BY JENNIFER BENTON, TEENOLOGY MOVIE CRITIC
LENGTH: Medium: 51 lines
``MILK MONEY'' can't seem to make up its mind about what it wants to be.
From the previews, it promises a sort of coming-of-age family comedy, but once you take your seat, you realize that racier undertones are lurking there.
The adolescent protagonist, Frank Wheeler (Michael Patrick Carter) lives alone with his widowed father and makes it his sole mission in life to see a naked woman.
He and two friends - one who is an obsessive-compulsive neat freak and another who is idolized by all the teeny-bopper girls for his leather jacket - combine the contents of their piggy banks with the intention of paying for a peek at a naked lady.
With the cash in a plastic bag, the enterprising trio hops on its bikes and (unbelievably) pedals to the city where, according to the young Marlon Brando-wannabe in the leather, ``The girls are naked all the time.''
What they find is trouble and V, the hooker with a heart of gold, played by Melanie Griffith. She fulfills their wish and then follows them home to a town that is so Norman Rockwellesque, it's also unbelievable.
When she meets Frank's dad, played by Ed Harris, Frank plays matchmaker.
``Milk Money'' then follows the same course as many other Hollywood creations before it. The plot is tired, exhausting, predictable. Why couldn't the writers have kept this film light and upbeat? Why must there always be a dark subplot?
Griffith is charming as the ``good'' bad girl V. However, it is hard to believe that she is so quickly turned into ``My Fair Lady.''
Carter and Harris also turn in good performances, although Carter's crying scene looks forced.
The movie's predictable, stretch-of-reality plot is saved by witty dialogue and cute coming-of-age situations. But audience be warned, this is not a family film. It even excludes its highlighted audience by achieving a PG-13 rating.
Save your milk money, and catch this one on video. MEMO: Jennifer Benton is a senior at Lakeland High.
ILLUSTRATION: PARAMOUNT photo
Ed Harris falls for Melanie Griffith in ``Milk Money.''
by CNB