THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1994, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Saturday, September 24, 1994 TAG: 9409230084
SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E7 EDITION: FINAL
SOURCE: Betsy Wright
LENGTH: Medium: 85 lines
THREE WEEKS AGO - just nine days before my 38th birthday - I found out I'm pregnant. (Yes, I knew I was pregnant before I wrote the infamous column on the Pope and birth control.)
My husband, Bernie, is ecstatic. At 46-years-old, this is his first child.
My daughter is ecstatic. She's wanted a little sister for years and is convinced it will be a girl.
I'm ecstatic. Just watching Bernie's and Caroline's glee is infectious.
My 14-year-old son is just OK about it.
``I'm happy for you if this is what you want,'' Luke said, ``but personally, I think you two are crazy.''
In the week since discovering this pregnancy, Bernie has burned up the telephone wires, announcing the news to all his friends and family. Everyone (with the exception of just-O.K.-about-it Luke) is ecstatic.
This is one wanted kid.
Every child should be so lucky.
A few days after ``the rabbit died,'' Caroline and I were in the car. Hands flying and eyes flashing, she animatedly babbled on about the new baby.
``May is such a great month to have a baby, Mom. Do you think it will look like me? Gosh, Mom, do you realize that when this kid is 12 like me, you'll be 51 years old! Boy, that's old!''
``Caroline,'' I said assuredly. ``That can't be. I don't think you've added that right.''
Inside my head, I did the math.
She was right. As usual.
``Well,'' I said, ``51 isn't really so old. It just seems old because you're so young.''
``Sure, Mom,'' she said sarcastically.
``Shut up, kid,'' I shot back.
We both laughed and I sent up one of those quick little prayers, thanking God for Caroline and Luke and Bernie and this new kid-to-be and for life in general. Then I felt the urge to use that time as a ``teachable moment.''
A ``teachable moment'' is one of those times when you can quickly instill some small value or impart a bit of wisdom to your child.
``Caroline,'' I said, ``isn't it wonderful that this baby is so wanted. Everybody's happy about it. Gosh, won't that be one lucky baby when it's born.''
``Yea,'' she agreed, with a little so-what's-your-point look on her face.
``Well, this is just something I want you to always remember. The reason everyone is so happy is that this baby has a mom and a dad and lots of family who love it already. And even though we're not rich or anything, we can afford this baby. We've even got a room for it and everything.''
``Yea,'' she said, still not quite sure of my point.
``Well, Honey, all I'm trying to say is that when a baby is wanted, it is the happiest thing in the world. That's the way it should always be. That's the way God wants it. He wants us to be happy about new babies . . . ''
``Yea,'' she agreed cheerfully.
`` . . . but that's not the way it always happens. Sometimes the mom isn't married, or she's real young, or there's not enough money to feed the baby and buy all the stuff it needs . . . ''
``Yea,'' she said sadly.
``Well, when that happens, then it's hard to be happy about that baby. It's really hard to want something you're not happy about, isn't it?''
Caroline just nodded her head.
``I just want you to think about that and remember how happy we are right now and why we're happy about this baby. Every baby deserves to have a mom and a dad who love it and want it. I know it's a long time off before you think about that for yourself, but just remember, Honey, that if you've made the right choices in life, you won't ever have to be sad about a baby. I just want you to be as happy as I am right now. That's all.''
``I get it, Mom,'' Caroline said, smiling.
``Lord, make it so,'' I prayed inside my head. MEMO: Next Week: Reader Response. Tell us about a time you had a ``teachable
moment'' with your child, or share something special your parent taught
you.
Every other week, Betsy Mathews Wright publishes responses to her
opinion column. Send responses to Issues of Faith, The Virginian-Pilot,
150 W. Brambleton Ave., Norfolk, Va. 23510; call (804) 446-2273; FAX
(804) 436-2798; or send e-mail to bmw(AT)infi.net. Deadline is Tuesday
before publication. You must include name, city and phone number.
by CNB