THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1994, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Saturday, October 15, 1994 TAG: 9410150190
SECTION: FRONT PAGE: A6 EDITION: FINAL
COLUMN: REAL POLITIK
SOURCE: BY KERRY DOUGHERTY, STAFF WRITER
LENGTH: Medium: 89 lines
Occasional dispatches on the offbeat side of Virginia's 1994 U.S. Senate race.
Marshall Coleman wants you to know about his poll. We've written about lots of polls - Mason-Dixon polls, Washington Post polls, VCU polls - but we haven't written about Coleman's poll because he won't let us see the whole thing.
His campaign commissioned the Mason-Dixon polling organization to do a private campaign poll, asking questions Coleman presumably helped select.
Coleman wants us to write about the part that he says shows 46 percent of Virginia's voters would cast their ballots for him on Election Day if they thought he had a chance of winning.
But that's not entirely accurate.
Actually, in response to the question: ``Would you be likely to vote for Coleman if you thought he could win?'' 29 percent said ``yes'' and 17 percent said ``maybe.''
Since we won't write about Coleman's poll, we commissioned our own. Realpolitik asked a representative sample of widows, orphans and bone-headed yahoos the questions people really care about in this campaign.
If a loaded revolver was held to your head, for whom would you vote?
(a) Robb - 12 percent
(b) North - 14 percent
(c) Coleman - 10 percent
(d) Pull the trigger - 64 percent
What percentage of voters will be leaving the state after the election?
(a) Moving to Haiti after a North victory - 60 percent
(b) Moving to Virginia Beach after a Robb victory - 60 percent
(c) Moving to Hell for the ice skating if Coleman wins - 60 percent
What do you think Lynda Robb whispers in Chuck Robb's ear when they are smiling and waving in public?
(a) ``We wouldn't be groveling for votes in Short Pump if you'd kept your pants on, Chuckie.'' - 35 percent
(b) ``If you lose I'm moving back to Texas and taking my ATM card with me.'' - 20 percent
(c) ``Next time order a Tom Collins'' - 45 percent
North and Robb are standing at the edge of a cliff. Whom do you push off first?
(a) North - 22 percent
(b) Robb - 22 percent
(c) Try desperately hard for a double play - 56 percent
Who has the best hair in the race?
(a) Oliver North, with his aging-Marine cut - 33 percent
(b) Chuck Robb, master of the greasy-helmet look - 33 percent
(c) Marshall Coleman, who manages to make real hair look like a toupee - 33 percent
Which candidate misses Doug Wilder the most?
(a) Marshall Coleman because he has no one to whisper with during joint appearances - 33 percent.
(b) Oliver North because it was a chance for him to hang around with a black guy - 33 percent.
(c) Chuck Robb because he has no one to blame but himself for his lousy poll numbers - 33 percent
Which candidate is best for Virginia?
(a) North - 33 percent
(b) Robb - 33 percent
(c) Marion Barry - 34 percent
We had several questions we posed only to our female respondents:
If you had to chose someone to date, whom would it be?
(a) Robb - 20 percent
(b) North - 20 percent
(c) Coleman - 6 percent
(d) Manuel Noriega - 54 percent
And for our older female respondents:
Whom would you most like for a son?
(a) Robb - 20 percent
(b) North - 20 percent
(c) Coleman - 6 percent
(d) Lyle Menendez - 54 percent
As a reward for taking part in our survey, you are entitled to a free 8 x 10 black-and-white glossy of any candidate. Which do you want?
(a) Robb naked with a beauty queen - 44 percent
(b) North naked with a pistol - 44 percent
(c) Marshall Coleman naked with John Warner - 12 percent
KEYWORDS: SENATE RACE CAMPAIGN by CNB