THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Sunday, February 12, 1995 TAG: 9502090192
SECTION: CAROLINA COAST PAGE: 05 EDITION: FINAL
COLUMN: Coastwise
SOURCE: Ford Reid
LENGTH: Medium: 59 lines
That really big blue jeans company recently announced computerized, custom fit dungarees. No more jeans that are a little too snug here, a little too loose there.
Now you can get a pair of jeans that fit you perfectly.
Unless you are a man.
Unfortunately, this computerized, custom-fit service is available only for women's jeans.
Men are left to buy something that more or less fits. Sort of. At least until you wash them. Or maybe until you wear them.
We are used to this.
Most men's trousers come in two sizes: Too large and too small.
That is because they come in two-inch increments in the waist, which is ridiculous. Hold your thumb and forefinger two inches apart. That is a lot of space, especially if it is determining whether your pants stay up or fall down.
If your are, say, thirty six and three quarters inches around the middle, you have two choices when you buy a pair of pants.
You can get a pair that is too small and resolve to lose weight or you can get a pair that is too large and stop by for a few pints of Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice cream on your way home.
Either way, you are going to be uncomfortable for the near future. Either you will be sucking in the gut constantly in an effort to avoid busting a button or you will be forever hitching up a pair of droopy trousers.
You will have paid $40 or $50 or more for the privilege of wearing a pair of pants that don't fit.
My father-in-law, who used to be in the rag trade, explained to me why this is. Long ago, before discount retailers and mail order catalogs, most men's trousers were sold in department stores and men's specialty shops. These places had batteries of tailors on hand to make alterations.
The stores wanted a limited number of sizes to keep down the inventory but thanks to skilled hands and a few needles and thread, every man left with a perfect fit.
That was fine 30 or 40 years ago. But now, most of us buy our pants in places where it is difficult to find any clerk and impossible to find one over the age of 18.
Or we buy them through the mail. At least the person on the other end of the telephone is very reassuring as he or she assures you that the pants will fit like they are made for you.
I think it is time we demanded more. This is, after all, almost the 21st Century. We have instant communication around the world by fax and computer. We have 80 channels on the television and 37 flavors of ice cream. We have cars with air bags and fat-free sour cream.
Everywhere you look, there is another miracle of the modern age.
Is it too much to ask for a pair of trousers that fit? by CNB