The Virginian-Pilot
                             THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT 
              Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: Wednesday, February 22, 1995           TAG: 9502220464
SECTION: MILITARY NEWS            PAGE: A8   EDITION: FINAL 
COLUMN: MY TURN
SOURCE: BY CYNTHIA LIMA, WVEC-TV
                                             LENGTH: Medium:   70 lines

``ARMY BRAT'' CHILDHOOD GAVE ME TOOLS TO SUCCEED

This column is written in response to last week's ``My Turn,'' a commentary on growing up in the military by Tabitha Soren, a correspondent for MTV and NBC-TV.

It's popular and, unfortunately, easy to play the victim these days.

There always seems to be an excuse for why someone's life has turned out the way it did.

And, in many cases that excuse is rooted in their childhood.

Well, I'll be the first to tell you my childhood wasn't easy.

As the daughter of a career soldier, I attended countless different schools in this country and overseas before I finished my education.

I saw my father go off to war, leaving my European mother alone to raise three children. She did it living in a civilian community that was hardly supportive of U.S. involvement in Vietnam. We had to live among the protesters who knew who my father was and what he did for a living. It was as if we were criminals instead of law-abiding citizens.

Classmates called my father a murderer. One boy said my dad should die there.

I was 7 years old.

That year's Christmas was the worst. We put my dad's picture under the tree and set a place for him at the dinner table. Somehow we thought doing that might bring him closer to us. Instead, it only made us realize just how alone we really were. When you bounce around as much as we did, the only stability you have in your daily life is your immediate family. When a key part of that is missing, so is your sense of security.

We never lived in the same house long enough to make it our home. Every new assignment meant starting life over again, somewhere else.

Different customs, different languages, different rules. What was acceptable in one culture was frowned upon in another. In some cases, by the time we knew our way around town, or felt comfortable enough to make friends, it was time to leave again.

I remember how upset I used to get each time we moved. Starting at a new school was such a frightening experience. Where was I going? Would I fit in? Would the academic placement test show I was ahead of my classmates, or behind? Would I get lost going home? Would I forget my new phone number?

The stomach aches.

How I remember those stomach aches.

Yes, my childhood was far from easy. But this is one adult who is proud to have been an ``Army Brat.''

You see, that difficult childhood molded me into the person I am today.

I learned discipline from our military way of life.

I learned about respect and how it is earned.

I learned about commitment and sacrifice.

I learned about work ethics and the importance of being a team player.

I learned hot to quickly adapt to new situations and environments.

I learned personal responsibility.

I also learned what it means to believe so much in something that you are willing to lay down your life for it.

You are right, Ms. Soren. It isn't easy being a military kid.

But I am not a ``victim'' of my childhood. I am a success because of it. MEMO: Cynthia Lima is the co-anchor of Channel 13's 6 p.m. newscast. She is

also WVEC's primary military affairs reporter. ILLUSTRATION: Photo

Cynthia Lima

by CNB