THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Monday, February 27, 1995 TAG: 9502250031
SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E1 EDITION: FINAL
TYPE: Column
SOURCE: Larry Maddry
LENGTH: Medium: 84 lines
I HEAR A LOT of petty complaining out there from people who should have bigger things to worry about.
Now it's my turn. You know the small thing that drives me crazy?
COLLEGE COACHES WHO WEAR SPORT COATS AND SUITS AT BASKETBALL GAMES!
You know what I mean. It is Saturday afternoon and a men's televised game is in progress. The camera pans to the bench.
We see players wearing warm-up uniforms - some in jackets and shorts - then the camera sweeps to the coach. He is dressed in a sport coat and tie and looks like a fashion model waiting for a bus.
Why do they do that? It's absolutely crazy. The other night I watched a basketball game between Georgetown University and Villanova. The President of the United States was there - not Hillary, the other one - and he was wearing a suit.
That's OK. Maybe Bill rushed over to the game after a Cabinet meeting.
But a basketball coach? I say get a grip. Do college football coaches dress up as though they were going to high tea at the Astor? Nope. Sweaters and sweat togs mostly. And I never saw a college baseball coach in the dugout pulling his pouch of chewing tobacco from a Brooks Brothers sport coat, either.
Then why do college basketball coaches do it? And in the college game it doesn't matter which sex we're talking about. Female coaches - who I'd expect to have better sense about such things - wear stylish dresses or pantsuits at the games.
What is going on here? What is it about basketball coaching that makes it an ad for GQ? The head coach sets the style for the entire coaching staff. So they sit in their fancy duds next to and among a collection of jocks in white socks and sneakers bathed in the aroma of sweat, rubber and liniment looking like pall bearers waiting for the corpse.
Lord knows I have tried to get to the bottom of this dress code delirium.
I think spitting and crotch-grabbing have a lot to do with it. In case you haven't noticed, there's a great deal of both by baseball and football coaches.
Basketball coaches refrain from spitting on the floor because they don't want an All-American point guard to slip on the wet spot and sprain an ankle.
Except for those instances when a player with sharp elbows or knees hurls toward the bench, I don't know whether basketball coaches are inclined to grab their crotches or not. But since they sit through most of the game, there's little opportunity for that satisfaction.
My theory is simple. Over the years basketball coaches came to believe they were a little tonier than their counterparts in the other sports. The thinking went this way:
``Here I sit without spitting or grabbing my crotch. I must be a pretty refined fellow. Perhaps I'm a cousin of the queen. Maybe it's high time I dressed for the part.''
There are some notable exceptions to the rule of hardwood haberdashery hokum. One is Bobby Knight, the coach at Indiana who certainly has his faults. But over dressing is not one of them. A sweater-wearer, Knight knows how to dress for an athletic contest. And, come to think of it, he's not bad at dressing down his players, either.
Other notable exceptions are Lou Carnesecca of St. Johns and Pete Carril of Princeton, whose sense of good taste rivaled Knight's. Both are given to sweat togs or sweaters.
Alas, two of the worst violaters are my hero Dean Smith of North Carolina and Coach K of Duke. Both dress as though they are leaving the court immediately after the game to either boogie with Princess Di or break bread with the Pope.
I haven't discussed the over-dressing with sports information directors at the colleges and universities.
But I know exactly what they would tell me. ``Coach Blank says he wears a suit and tie because he is representing the university.''
Excuse me, do I have a rutabaga in my ear? Who do those graduates in the stands represent? You know the ones screaming at the top of their lungs, wearing shirts and sweaters in their school colors - the ones in jeans, khakis and corduroys. Who are they representing? The government of Sierra Leone?
Those college hoop coaches need to diagram a fast, back-door cut to reality. And slam dunk their fancy duds in the hamper. ILLUSTRATION: [Color Photo]
Dean Smith, of UNC, is one of the worst violators
by CNB