THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Sunday, April 2, 1995 TAG: 9503310238
SECTION: CHESAPEAKE CLIPPER PAGE: 03 EDITION: FINAL
SOURCE: BY ERIC FEBER, STAFF WRITER
LENGTH: Long : 113 lines
For many people the word ``cancer'' means either death or lifelong disability.
But Wendy Schlessel Harpham's diagnosis of cancer meant a new life and a new purpose.
She has seen both sides of the situation: as a cancer patient who was diagnosed with lymphoma, a cancer of the lymph system, in November 1990 and as a physician with a practice in internal medicine.
Harpham will be in Chesapeake to give a free presentation Thursday as part of the official dedication ceremony for the $2.8 million Chesapeake General Hospital Cancer Treatment Center.
``There was no question that I was totally shocked'' by the diagnosis of cancer, the 36-year-old internist and mother of three young children said during a telephone interview from her Dallas home. ``Hearing you have cancer is a shocking diagnosis. It's hard to believe it's happening to you. The doctor part of me knew what was happening and what to do, but now the patient side of me had to deal with the very real human, emotional part of it.''
Harpham didn't lament what had happened to her life, sink into depression or feel her career was over. She decided to take her unusual perspective as both a medical doctor and a cancer patient and use it to educate others.
She wrote two books and is working on a third.
First, she published ``Diagnosis Cancer: Your Guide Through the First Few Months'' in 1992. The book is a guide to cancer treatment written in plain, clear everyday language.
Then, last year, she published ``After Cancer: A Guide to Your New Life,'' a guide cancer survivors can use to help them live full, productive and meaningful lives.
Both books, published by the W.W. Norton Co., have been universally praised by doctors, cancer specialists, care-givers and patients as two of the best books on the subject.
Currently, she's working on another book, due out next year, about healthy children whose parents have survived cancer.
``As a doctor, I know what a patient needs. Now, as a patient, I know the emotional needs,'' she said. ``My whole goal is to teach people to be healthy survivors. To arm them with knowledge to allow them to make the best choices possible in cancer treatment, the best path towards better health.''
Harpham said that 30 years ago a diagnosis of cancer usually meant a death sentence. To this day, many people still equate the word cancer with automatic death. But, she said, cancer diagnosis and treatments have advanced substantially during the past three decades. Many supportive therapies have been developed so patients can live longer and the risk is lower.
Now more and more people are surviving cancer, but there is no easy path and no one way to treat the disease.
``Treating cancer is still pretty rigorous,'' she said. ``There are many choices to make, many treatments. There's surgery, chemotherapy, radiation. There is no real right way to treat cancer; it depends on the doctor's judgment, the symptoms, the type of cancer, the patient's overall health and other factors like that.''
In her first book, Harpham tried to answer the questions patients ask, so that they can maximize time spent with the doctor.
``This helps the patient overcome the anxiety felt over the diagnosis,'' she said. ``I try to lead people to recognize where they still have some control in their lives. The book doesn't give answers; it teaches people to get their own. I want to empower cancer patients with knowledge to allay their fears and allow them to make educated choices. Then, after a patient makes the decisions, I encourage them to not look back. I want them to feel right about their decisions.''
Harpham said her cancer is the type that routinely goes into remission and then comes back. She's again had to undergo chemotherapy.
``I have the cancer now, but it's being treated again,'' she said. ``But I can live with it. I'm not just withering away in bed.''
Harpham said the treatments have sapped her energy and curbed her appetite. She has adjusted her life around those realities. Although she is an active person, who's always on the go, the cancer has slowed her down. Now, she must take daily naps to renew her energy.
She said that's what her second book is all about: becoming a healthy survivor who maximizes the life he or she still has. With cancer, most people either want to die or be in perfect health, and it doesn't work like that anymore, she said.
``It's about learning to take the best care of oneself, learning the body's limitations'' she said. ``For me, it's a sacrifice to take that daily nap, but I know it makes my quality of life better.''
Even though she has embarked on a new medical/education/writing career and appreciates her life and family, she said she does not align herself with those who say that getting cancer is the best thing that happened to their lives. No way, she said.
``I don't like it that I have cancer. I am not glad I got sick. That's one of the first things I tell people,'' she said. ``Believe me, I wish I didn't have it, and I wish that every day.''
Now Harpham said she feels good enough to work and enjoy life but still not ``normal.''
``But I'm still loving my life, my work, my husband and my children,'' she said. ``I appreciate them every day of my life. I don't sweat the small stuff.''
She said one should even enjoy life while undergoing treatment.
``Don't wish any of that time away,'' she said. ``With my situation, I've been able to teach my children some powerful lessons. They know I'm the same person whether bald or not, and they know that their mommy and daddy love each other and stick together, no matter what. I've had more time with my children, and I've learned about social medicine.'' MEMO: To see Wendy Harpham's free presentation at this Thursday's dedication
of Chesapeake General Hospital's new Cancer Treatment Center, call the
HealthCare Connection at 547-7800 to register. Harpham will be on hand
to autograph copies of her books following her presentation Thursday
evening and on Friday from 10-11 a.m. at Greenbrier Mall's Waldenbooks
store. ILLUSTRATION: Photo
Wendy Schlessel Harpham
Physician
by CNB