THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Friday, May 5, 1995 TAG: 9505050069
SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E1 EDITION: FINAL
LENGTH: Long : 111 lines
NOW THAT IT is finally May, prom hysteria has hit an all-time high.
What to wear?
What to do?
Where to eat?
And, most importantly, who's the date?
We've received so many questions about prom that we decided to stray from our regular column format to address them fully. The problems that seem to cause the most angst are what to do if you don't have a date to prom and how to afford it once you do.
First and foremost, don't panic. This is only one night, and there is still time to ask someone and have a total blast without depleting your life savings.
There are many options for the still dateless. If you are a girl and you don't have a date, don't wait to be asked. Remember, this is the '90s. Pick up the phone and call a good friend or maybe someone you would just like to know better.
Other options include a summer boyfriend or a friend of the family. But keep in mind that taking someone from another school is a big responsibility. He may not know anyone else at the dance or parties, so you will have to introduce him and make sure he feels comfortable.
We realize that asking a guy is harder than it sounds, but remember, guys are just as scared of rejection as you are. Many of them will be flattered that you asked.
Now guys, there are many girls out there who are probably available and would love to go. It seems that everyone keeps a running list of who is going with whom, so look around and listen, and you'll probably find someone. It would simply be tragic to stay home on prom night because two people were too scared to ask each other.
If going as a couple isn't your thing, then there is always the option of going stag. Stag, however, doesn't necessarily mean that you have to go by yourself. Get a group of friends together who also don't have dates and go in a group.
Julie Sitten, a U.Va. freshman, recalls her senior prom: ``My friends and I went to prom in a big group. Some of my other friends went with people they didn't like just for the sake of having a date and ended up having a terrible time. I'm grateful I went alone.''
It may not sound very ``traditional,'' but approaching prom this way gives you the opportunity to dress up and have a great time dancing and talking with your friends without the pressures of a date.
Another option is staying home. We're serious. Prom is not the be all and end all of your life. Amy Middleton, a sophomore at Connecticut College who skipped her senior prom, said, ``My parents were like, `You'll regret this,' but I didn't at all. My friends spent a lot of money and ended up kind of bored. Meanwhile, a friend and I watched a bunch of cheesy old prom movies and laughed our heads off.''
Keep in mind that prom is only one night, and even Winona Ryder didn't attend her high school prom.
Now, on to the money. Those of you who have dates seem to be worried about financing the whole thing. The first thing to remember is that a night can be memorable without being expensive.
Dresses are always expensive if you go to pricey boutiques. But many stores in Hampton Roads have a great selection of dresses with not-so-steep prices. Try going to stores like Loehmann's in Virginia Beach that have designer dresses at discount prices.
Also, consider designing your own dress and getting it made by your mother or a seamstress. That guarantees no one else will show up in the same dress. Or try one of the many quality second-hand shops where clothes are carefully screened to make sure they are in good condition and in style. These stores are listed in the Yellow Pages under ``consignment shops.''
And, if you don't mind wearing the dress for one night, rentals are always an option. At Elegant Rentals in Virginia Beach, owner Kathleen M. Terrana says they have ``a zillion things - short, long, regular, sequins, velvet, taffeta.'' Sizes run from 2 to 18.
Prom is even more expensive for the guy, who is usually expected to pick up the tab. Tickets, tuxes, dinner and limos add up to a hefty sum. First of all, no one says you have to go to a stuffy, pricey restaurant before prom. One alternative is having a bunch of couples to someone's house for a homemade dinner. The cost of the food could be split among the couples, and this is a great time for photo opportunities and group bonding.
If staying at home doesn't ``float your boat,'' pulling up at Doumar's drive-in in Norfolk in a stretch limo and formal wear, and eating a cheeseburger while looking up at the stars would make it a night to remember.
Limo's are not mandatory, but they can become affordable if you split the cost among three or four couples. If that doesn't work, you could always ask dad for the keys to his car. The cost of prom night could also become more manageable if the couple goes dutch. Remember, a memorable night doesn't necessarily mean it has to be expensive.
We've found that attitudes toward prom differ quite a bit. To some, it's just another night out. For others, it's the most important night of their high school career, one they've anticipated for years. No matter what it means to you, keep in mind that much of the stress associated with it is unwarranted.
After all, it's just ONE night. MEMO: Smitha Gottimukkala is a senior at Norfolk Academy. Jonathan Kolm is a
senior at Tallwood High. Their column appears biweekly in Teenology.
They accept questions on INFOLINE. Call 640-5555 and enter category
8335. Or write to them at 4565 Virginia Beach Blvd., Virginia Beach, Va.
23462.
ILLUSTRATION: JOHN CORBITT/Staff
Color photos
JONATHAN KOLM AND SMITHA GOTTIMUKKALA ARE THE TEEN ADVICE
COLUMNISTS...
by CNB