THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Sunday, July 30, 1995 TAG: 9507260065
SECTION: REAL LIFE PAGE: K7 EDITION: FINAL
COLUMN: THE IMPERFECT NAVIGATOR
SOURCE: ALEXANDRIA BERGER
LENGTH: Medium: 76 lines
I'VE DISCOVERED when something is exciting, it's easy, and when something is rewarding, it's difficult. Keep that in mind.
Recently, I had a phone conversation with Maureen Hollowell. ``My 14-year old daughter, Elizabeth, is a deaf, spina bifida, wheelchair-using teenager. She just won three gold medals in discus, shot and javelin, at the Junior National Wheelchair Games,'' she states with deserved pride.
They travel a lot. My column on disabled travel didn't hit home. ``Sure, sometimes people and access are fine,'' she continued. ``But most of the time, it's hard. People can be cruel.''
Maureen Hollowell's anguish about the injustices disabled kids face struck me. In Maureen and Elizabeth's world, the difficult has been rewarding. But they would have preferred easy.
After all, this is the fifth anniversary of the passing of the Americans with Disabilities Act.
The Civil Rights Act is old hat. The federal Fair Housing Act has been expanded by most states, including Virginia.
So, what's the down side? ``Disabled children and teenagers can't understand why progress is such an uphill grind,'' says Hollowell.
``They can't understand why people won't treat them like everyone else. The laws are largely ignored. It leaves an indelible mark on their young impressionable minds.''
Maureen Hollowell speaks with conviction. She's right.
In our society, being treated differently when you're young means you're ``out.'' Remember the awkwardness of your own school years? Multiply that times 10.
If you're too different, if you're a kid with a disability, life can be devastating. Being stared at, made to feel like a freak, spoken to as if the phrase ``physically disabled'' meant ``mentally deficient'' is intolerable.
Try explaining to disabled children why there is no wheelchair ramp over the curb at the playground, or why the school separates them from the other kids. Disabled children are entitled to be educated with other children. It's the law.
These kids have two choices. They can grow up to become bitter, frustrated, depressed adults, or they can develop perception, sensitivity, character and the determination to excel in spite of labels.
Maureen Hollowell and hundreds of parents like her have chosen to impart the latter qualities to their disabled offspring. Their children will become productive, compassionate members of the human race, having learned that the difficult path brings rewards beyond compare.
Elizabeth is just one of many, the product of supportive guidance and conscientious upbringing.
If we believe that because our children are sighted they see, if our children are hearing they listen, if our children are ambulatory they can stand up to any situation, then we're wrong.
The Hollowells are proof that we teach by example. We pass on to our children prejudices and attitudes, both good and bad.
This is why people like Maureen Hollowell believe progress in changing people's behavior is an educational battle.
When our Congress enacted legislation protecting the disabled, it was exciting. And easy. Lobbying to provide for this legislation was difficult.
The result was rewarding. Our elected officials patted themselves on the back. However, ignorance, bigotry and arrogance have made effective enforcement of these laws a legal nightmare. It has proven a demoralizing experience for the disabled and their families.
Five years is not a very long time, but in the life of a child it's the next stage of development. In five more years, Elizabeth Hollowell will be 19 years old - an adult.
She will carry the torch her mother has burned so brightly to help light her child's way. We can't lose. It won't be easy, but nothing worth having ever is. It's what makes difficult so rewarding. MEMO: Write to Alexandria Berger c/o The Imperfect Navigator, The
Virginian-Pilot, 150 W. Brambleton Avenue, Norfolk, Va. 23510. by CNB