THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Monday, October 30, 1995 TAG: 9510280058
SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E1 EDITION: FINAL
TYPE: Column
SOURCE: Larry Maddry
LENGTH: Medium: 78 lines
IT WAS H.L. MENCKEN who said ``A man may be a fool and not know it. But not if he's married.''
And that goes double if he has children.
This morning we offer as Exhibit A the case of Jan Elliassen. Jan will give a reading tonight of Lewis Carroll's children's poem ``The Walrus and the Carpenter'' at the Virginia Marine Science Museum in Virginia Beach.
He will deliver the reading in a walrus suit. As you might expect, wearing a walrus suit while reading that poem to children is not the fulfillment of a lifetime dream for him.
``Frankly, I would have preferred to remain at home,'' Jan said. ``My wife works at the museum. And my daughter has logged over 500 hours as a volunteer. What was I to do?''
What indeed.
He said when his wife, Joy, and daughter, Jessica, explained that the museum was doing a Halloween program for kids under-12 again this year and needed someone to read the poem in a walrus suit, he briefly dug in his heels.
``I told them I'd prefer to stay at home nailing deer skins to the wall and getting in touch with my psychic spear,'' he said.
But he wimped out.
He said he had just returned from an editors conference in St. Louis. ``I memorized the poem while taking showers in the hotel,'' he reported. He began reciting the poem. I listened until he got to the part where the walrus says the time has come to talk of many things including shoes and ships, etc., and told him I'd heard enough.
``That poem is longer than the line at the Pottery,'' I said.
``I know,'' he replied. ``I was duped into thinking it was a much shorter poem before I committed to it.''
He said plans call for him to walk outside the museum and give a moonlight reading of the poem to kids. Jan said the reading will be given on a boardwalk leading across Owl Creek marsh.
``I wanted to give the reading while reclining,'' he said. ``But I was told I could only sit because the flippers are not well-glued and may fall off if I lie down.''
When I asked if he knew what else was planned for the kids at the museum's Halloween program - tonight from 6 to 8 - he said he didn't have a clue.
``I am only familiar with my own sorry act,'' he said, in a faint and forlorn voice.
When I phoned the museum, Halloween program coordinator Annabel Rimmer said children attending tonight's event will be treated to a scavenger hunt, apply face paints, receive treats for correctly answering questions about museum exhibits, learn how to make a ladybug whirly-bird with a pencil and other craft items. Adult volunteers will all wear Halloween costumes, she said.
However, Annabel emphasized that Jan's poetry reading will be the ``centerpiece''of the program. When Jan finishes his reading on the marsh deck, an attempt will be made to attract an owl to the museum by broadcasting taped owl hoots and screeches over the creek to the trees beyond.
After speaking with Annabel, I gave Jan another call to arrange for his photograph in the walrus suit. I wondered if he had given a reading in costume to anyone.
``Only to those who Shanghaied me into this,'' he replied. ?''
I cautioned him not to give too good a performance. ``They might like your reading so much, you'll be asked to do it again next year,'' I cautioned. ``Have you thought of that, Jan?''
``No,'' he said. ``And I'd greatly appreciate your not mentioning it to anyone.'' MEMO: Admission fees for the museum's Halloween program are $4 and $6 (for
nonmembers). Admission is free for all parents accompanying children.
For more info, call 437 4949.
ILLUSTRATION: LAWRENCE JACKSON / The Virginian-Pilot
[Color Photo]
by CNB