THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Sunday, November 26, 1995 TAG: 9511260062
SECTION: LOCAL PAGE: B1 EDITION: FINAL
SOURCE: ELIZABETH SIMPSON
LENGTH: Long : 116 lines
Princess Diana's latest revelations in ``As the Monarchy Turns'' have scandalized Buckingham Palace, we're told.
It's a spectacular shock to the royal family, says the press. The palace is furious, report the tabs.
Get a grip here, your royal highnesses. What shocking scandal could possibly top those we've already heard about? Like Charles having sex in the bushes, and Diana making prank telephone calls.
I would think royal confessions would be as old as some of the Queen Mum's hats by now.
And what do we care anyway? If the prince and princess have had enough of each other, I've surely had enough of them. What is the royal family but a bunch of people who wave from balconies before traipsing off to play polo on their country estates?
What a sweet deal these folks have. They don't lift a finger to rule the country, yet all that money from the loyal subjects keeps right on rolling in. At a cost of $100 million a year for yachts and castles and planes and islands and such, the Brits at least deserve some good role models from their royals. They deserve people who act regally.
But the Chuck-and-Di generation looks more like something out of daytime TV.
Give them a month and the royal couple will be having fisticuffs over who gets to be on ``Geraldo'' first. They are your typical '90s misfits - self-absorbed, awash in victimhood and desperate to even the score. Each wants to blame the other for the collapse of their marriage in whatever tell-all form they can find.
Listen to some of the revelations we've been privy to in the past year.
Charles is secretly recorded as saying he would like to come back as the tampon of his mistress, Camilla Parker-Bowles. Gee, how romantic can you get? He complains that he had a lonely childhood, and that his mum didn't have much time for him. He laments his overbearing father bullied him into marrying Diana.
Ummmm, Charles? You were 32 years old at the time.
And then we have Princess Di, who looks so lovely helping sick people, but is no slouch when it comes to getting in the last word when push comes to shove.
Now we hear that she had an affair, too! Get out. I'm shocked. And that she was suicidal and bulimic and miserable in marriage. She complains about the chilly reception she got from the royal household, and in the same breath says she won't divorce without a fight.
It's all too depressing for words, even if we've heard it all before. These sob stories give the pampered rich a bad name.
If Lady Diana really wants to be queen in the people's hearts, maybe she could start by giving some of the money she's spent over the years to the poor slobs who earned it.
All this bedroom farce makes one yearn for the 1930s, when Edward VIII was kept from the throne because he wished to marry an American who was - gasp - twice divorced. Oh, how scandalous.
The government threatened to resign when he announced his intentions to marry one Wallis Simpson. Rather than face that, the king relinquished his throne, ``for the woman I love.''
Now that's what I call royalty.
Princess Diana's latest revelations in ``As the Monarchy Turns'' have scandalized Buckingham Palace, we're told.
It's a spectacular shock to the royal family, says the press. The palace is furious, report the tabs.
Get a grip here, your royal highnesses. What shocking scandal could possibly top those we've already heard about? Like Charles having sex in the bushes, and Diana making prank telephone calls.
I would think royal confessions would be as old as some of the Queen Mum's hats by now.
And what do we care anyway? If the prince and princess have had enough of each other, I've surely had enough of them. What is the royal family but a bunch of people who wave from balconies before traipsing off to play polo on their country estates?
What a sweet deal these folks have. They don't lift a finger to rule the country, yet all that money from the loyal subjects keeps right on rolling in. At a cost of $100 million a year for yachts and castles and planes and islands and such, the Brits at least deserve some good role models from their royals. They deserve people who act regally.
But the Chuck-and-Di generation looks more like something out of daytime TV.
Give them a month and the royal couple will be having fisticuffs over who gets to be on ``Geraldo'' first. They are your typical '90s misfits - self-absorbed, awash in victimhood and desperate to even the score. Each wants to blame the other for the collapse of their marriage in whatever tell-all form they can find.
Listen to some of the revelations we've been privy to in the past year.
Charles is secretly recorded as saying he would like to come back as the tampon of his mistress, Camilla Parker-Bowles. Gee, how romantic can you get? He complains that he had a lonely childhood, and that his mum didn't have much time for him. He laments his overbearing father bullied him into marrying Diana.
Ummmm, Charles? You were 32 years old at the time.
And then we have Princess Di, who looks so lovely helping sick people, but is no slouch when it comes to getting in the last word when push comes to shove.
Now we hear that she had an affair, too! Get out. I'm shocked. And that she was suicidal and bulimic and miserable in marriage. She complains about the chilly reception she got from the royal household, and in the same breath says she won't divorce without a fight.
It's all too depressing for words, even if we've heard it all before. These sob stories give the pampered rich a bad name.
If Lady Diana really wants to be queen in the people's hearts, maybe she could start by giving some of the money she's spent over the years to the poor slobswho earned it.
All this bedroom farce makes one yearn for the 1930s, when Edward VIII was kept from the throne because he wished to marry an American who was - gasp - twice divorced. Oh, how scandalous.
The government threatened to resign when he announced his intentions to marry one Wallis Simpson. Rather than face that, the king relinquished his throne, ``for the woman I love.''
Now that's what I call royalty. by CNB