THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1996, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Thursday, January 4, 1996 TAG: 9601040296
SECTION: LOCAL PAGE: B1 EDITION: FINAL
SOURCE: CHARLISE LYLES
LENGTH: Medium: 68 lines
A New Year's resolution?
``It's like something that you set out to do,'' answered a 12-year-old whom I've befriend as a big sister and mentor.
But the last words of her answer curled into a question mark, a sign that she wasn't quite sure about that.
Goals. Sometimes I dread them. But drop them and my life goes drip, drip, drip down the long, hollow drain of inertia.
Which is where I sometimes find my little friend and other youths - slumped inert before the household television shrine. Their most pressing goal: to soak up the next session of MTV or VH-1.
And even if the grade or middle-school spelling list has taught them the meaning of a goal, it's often not yet a part of their vocabulary - a word they've come to live by. The word that propels them from point A to Z, uncovering talents, interests, adventures, experiences, failure and sweet success all along the way. And oh, the possibilities.
Archie Nelson III is no inert child. The 13-year-old eighth-grader at St. Gregory The Great School in Virginia Beach is popping with goals from mastering the ivory keys to improving on the computer keys.
I've great confidence in Archie's modus operandi. After all, he's the only 13-year-old I know with a resume, a list of impressive Boy Scout credentials, summer-camp experiences, community service and extracurricular activities.
With all the distractions of TV, girls and just plain being 13, how does Archie do it? He offered some helpful hints for his cohorts like my 12-year-old friend. And they sounded pretty good to this adult, too.
Keep focused on a singular goal that means alot to you.
``My No. 1 goal is to make Eagle Scout this year, which is the highest rank in scouting,'' Archie recites, his voice resonating resolve. The Life Scout in Troop 77 at First Baptist Church in Norfolk has already designed a scout project to promote bicycle safety among youths in the Young Terrace public housing development.
Think BIG, but within reason when setting goals. If you start out with a peewee of a goal, you'll likely end up with even less. And make a plan and schedule.
Archie's Scout project is all plotted on paper: He'll conduct a survey, solicit help from churches and bike shops, and distribute bike helmets to needy youngsters. He's already won support at Norfolk City Hall.
``Avoid getting lazy,'' says Archie. ``I try to stay busy at all times, as busy as I can. I finish my homework around 6. Sometimes I go to church during the week. I'll read the newspaper or go outside and ride my bike. I try to practice piano 20 or 30 minutes a day.''
Encourage others. Last summer at Scout camp, Archie's roommate was depressed about his parents divorcing. When he talked of suicide, Archie stayed up half the night, comforting, consoling and racking his brain to convince his pal of everything there is to live for.
``That was a very tense moment for me,'' says Archie. ``I told him he had the future to live for, even if his parents did split up. The next day he said, `You really saved my life.' I kept saying, `No I didn't.' ''
But that experience showed Archie just how positive and encouraging he could be. To this day, it spurs him along in his own challenges.
Take time to reflect on your goals. Yes - we have an introspective 13-year-old here.
Says Archie: ``I type them down on my computer and I try to look back and think about what I said in my New Year's resolution and whether I'm really on target.'' by CNB