THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1996, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Wednesday, April 3, 1996 TAG: 9604030031
SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E1 EDITION: FINAL
SOURCE: FROM STAFF AND WIRE REPORTS
LENGTH: Medium: 77 lines
SCOTT ADAMS believes American office workers work too long.
Not too hard mind you. Just too long.
Adams is the author of ``Dilbert,'' the comic strip about the workplace.
It's the fastest-growing strip in America these days, appearing in more than 700 newspapers, and one that resonates with just about anyone who's ever worked in an office.
``I know of no business that doesn't have these kinds of people and these kinds of problems,'' says Mike Burnett, a resource manager for the U.S. Atlantic Command's Intelligence Directorate in Norfolk.
``Dilbert,'' he says, ``is a great venting mechanism.''
Burnett has posted a strip in his small cubicle that reads, ``We can fit five more people in this cubicle if we remove the chair.''
``I can walk in any office in the Intelligence Directorate and there's one posted,'' Burnett says.
Judging from Adams' e-mail - you can reach him at ScottAdams(AT)aol.com - a lot of cubicle-bound office workers find that ``Dilbert'' hits home.
Adams himself formerly was ``a midlevel manager assigned to cubicle 4S700R'' at Pacific Bell headquarters in California.
That is, until he was apparently ``right-sized'' out of his job. He now devotes his time to ``Dilbert,'' making speeches for big bucks and publishing books, the latest of which is ``The Dilbert Principle'' (Harper Business, $20) due out in June. It joins his other efforts, ``It's Obvious You Won't Survive by Your Wits Alone,'' ``Bring Me the Head of Willy the Mailboy,'' ``Shave the Whales,'' ``Dogbert's Clues for the Clueless,'' ``Always Postpone Meetings With Time-Wasting Morons'' and ``Building a Better Life by Stealing Office Supplies.''
There's nothing unusual about that publishing output. Cartoonists don't buy Mercedeses on what newspapers pay them. Especially because they usually split the take with the syndicates that sell and service their output.
But unlike most cartoonists, who simply reprint their cartoons, Adams throws in a lot of words about the problems of management and the workplace. Most of those words are cynical, humorous and often subversive to the established order.
And, for managers addicted to MBBS - that's Management By Best Seller - Adams has a few words of genuine wisdom in ``The Dilbert Principle.''
Like forcing everyone to go home at quitting time. If everyone has to go home then, they'll get the work done instead of looking at dirty pictures on the Internet. And if the boss has too much to do to join everyone else in the stampede out the door, she'll learn better how to delegate the work and not micromanage her underlings.
Everyone will be happier, and happier employees are more productive employees.
Some other tips from Adams.
Stick to fundamentals. Any activity once removed from getting the product out the door isn't fundamental. Talking to a customer is fundamental. Talking about customers isn't.
Stay out of the way. For example, let the employees dress the way they want. I may wear jeans in the office, but I know if I go out and talk to a businessman, I need to wear a coat and tie or he won't respect me in the morning.
Fire the people who enjoy causing conflict. ``Some conflict is healthy,'' Adams writes. ``But if you do it with disrespect, or you seem to be enjoying it, or you do it in every situation, guess what - you're an (expletive). And you're gone.''
Keep meetings short. Get to the point and get on.
Make sure your employees are learning something every day. ``The more you know, the more connections form in your brain, and the easier every task becomes.'' And something that Adams doesn't say, but obviously practices, is, don't take yourself seriously. The product of work - satisfied customers, employees and stockholders - is very serious.
Doing it shouldn't be. ILLUSTRATION: United Features Syndicate drawing
by CNB