THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1996, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Thursday, April 11, 1996 TAG: 9604110024
SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E1 EDITION: FINAL
SOURCE: BY FRANK ROBERTS, STAFF WRITER
LENGTH: Long : 117 lines
YOU MIGHT be a redneck if. . . you have an engineering degree from Georgia Tech and once worked for IBM.
You might make a wad of dough if. . . you are an observant redneck.
``I was at a Waffle House in Columbia, S.C., about 1 a.m.,'' Jeff Foxworthy said, during a phone interview. ``The jukebox was playin' and this couple, with one too many cocktails, started slow dancing.''
The result of that observation is this line: ``You might be a redneck if you ever slow danced in a Waffle House.''
Redneckism, the world's happiest and most popular ``ism'' is, according to its glorious leader, ``a glorious absence of sophistication, temporary or permanent.
``It's kind of an attitude, not a matter of education, how much money you have, or where you live,'' said the well-educated Foxworthy, who has plenty of cash on hand, and lives in Beverly - Hills, that is.
He will leave the Hills home for Hampton, appearing at the Coliseum Saturday.
He will be on stage for two hours but, surprise-surprise, only about five minutes is devoted to redneck jokes.
``The other stories are about my wife and daughters, families,'' said Foxworthy, whose wife said, ``redneck brings 'em to see you, but they're not necessarily what brings them back.''
His spouse is former actress, Pamela Gregg, whom he calls Gregg. They wed in 1985.
Now, there are beaucoup stage appearances, two albums including one approaching triple and a double platinum, awards, videos, seven top-selling books and another on the way, numerous guest shots on television including Leno last Monday, and ABCs ``The Jeff Foxworthy Show.''
He loves doing the program but has more fun, works harder, and makes more money with stand-up comedy.
``I'm enjoying the show. It's a job where I can stay home and see my girls,'' Foxworthy said. ``As soon as I hang up, I'm gonna take 'em to the park.''
Celebrity problems out in the open?
``People come up and say hello, tell me they're a redneck, then go on their way,'' said the easygoing Foxworthy who, with his wife and two daughters, will be staying overnight in the area after the Coliseum stint.
``We have some friends here. They have a farm,'' he said, ``and they also have two little girls. Their mom is my wife's roommate from college.''
The family-oriented Foxworthy makes sure no one's family is offended by his efforts.
``I'm about the cleanest comedian working now,'' he said. ``Twelve years of doing this and I've never said the ``f''-word on stage - pretty amazing in comedy these days. You don't have to be filthy to be funny.''
Ed McMahon's ``Star Search'' didn't consider him funny at all, rejecting him six times because, they said, he was ``too Southern.''
That's how the Foxworthy legend began.
``I was called a redneck because of my accent. I was in Chicago, L.A., New York and was always kidded about the accent,'' he said. ``Once, I worked in a comedy club in Michigan. It was attached to a bowling alley that had valet parking.
``I told 'em, `You don't think you have rednecks here? Look out the window.' I went back to the hotel and wrote about it,'' Foxworthy said. ``I came back the next night and tried it onstage. It worked from the very first night and worked the right way - people nudging each other in recognition.''
Once, there was a first family nudge-nudge.
At the presidential gala at Ford's Theatre in Washington, D.C., last year, Foxworthy said, ``If you ever put Astroturf in the back of your pickup, you might be a redneck.''
The comedian knew it hit home for the Clintons when he saw Hillary nudge Bill, reminding the president he had done that.
Redneck reminiscence. Here's another:
``Perfect example,'' Foxworthy said. ``Ever tour Graceland? I stood in that jungle room and I thought - you can't give money to rednecks.''
Well, look at Jeff.
``I just got a new pickup truck. My wife said - you have your own television show. You can have any kind of car you want,'' he said. ``I got a real pretty truck - brand-new. Well, it is a sissy truck.''
He will drive to his hometown of Atlanta at Olympics time. He was asked to entertain.
``I was trying to avoid that. It's gonna be a zoo,'' Foxworthy said. ``My philosophy is: the Olympics in Georgia? They're gonna mess it up.''
You might be a redneck if. . . ``when they let the doves go, you see someone with a shotgun.''
Recently, Foxworthy was walking through an airport, his 4-year-old daughter, Jordan, perched on his shoulders.
``Someone asked me for my autograph, then Jordan asked, `Daddy, why do people like you so much?'
`` `Why do you think?,' I asked her.''
`` `Because,' '' she said, `` `you make people laugh.' ''
Some of the best-known redneck jokes? Here are a few.
Remember, they all begin with, You might be a redneck if. . .
You wear a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.
You've ever taken a beer to a job interview.
You ever financed a tattoo.
You smoked during your wedding.
The most common phrase heard in your house is ``someone go jiggle the handle.''
You see a sign that says ``say no to crack'' and it reminds you to pull up your jeans.
You've ever been too drunk to fish.
Your idea of quality entertainment is a six-pack and a bug zapper.
You've ever had to haul a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.
You've ever mowed your lawn and found a car. MEMO: JUST THE FACTS
What: Jeff Foxworthy with Bill Engvall
When: 8 p.m. Saturday
Where: Hampton Coliseum
Tickets: $18.75 to $35, available at Ticketmaster outlets, or charge
by phone at 671-8100 or 872-8100 ILLUSTRATION: Photo
Jeff Foxworthy
by CNB