THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1996, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Thursday, May 9, 1996 TAG: 9605090547
SECTION: SPORTS PAGE: C1 EDITION: FINAL
TYPE: Column
SOURCE: Bob Molinaro
LENGTH: Medium: 73 lines
The weirdos, gasbags and assorted druggies are just going to have to work a little harder if they expect to get under my skin.
I can see that, in his own pathetic ways, Dennis Rodman is trying, but he's wasting his time.
The heavy mascara, fishnet stockings, tattoos, hair dye and life-with-Madonna shtick are all designed to outrage people, but it won't work on me.
Rodman is flaky, all right, but in the calculated way of someone auditioning for the sequel to ``The Birdcage.'' Beneath the mascara, he isn't much different from any other athlete who puts a lot of effort into protecting his image against the sort of rumor and false statements that could hurt a player's massive earning power off the court.
It's a constant struggle. Just the other day, Chicago Bulls general manager Jerry Krause said something awful about Rodman. He said, ``For the most part Dennis is a decent human being.''
Now you can see why Rodman distrusts people. Imagine some impressionable kid reading that. Rodman would just have to deny it later. Who would want to buy a book written by a decent human being?
If a player doesn't quickly put an end to this sort of thing, somebody might decide that Rodman is not really all that scandalizing.
In promoting his weirdness, Rodman reveals real talent. There is an art to making people's skin crawl.
But what Rodman works at way too hard - trying to be shocking - comes quite naturally to Marge Schott.
What Rodman is to tattoos, Schott is to stupid opinions. Both, apparently, are permanent.
It was in 1993 that the dog-loving Cincinnati Reds owner was sent by baseball to a kind of moral obedience school to learn the difference between an opinion and a slur.
Now, as then, Schott has apologized for some of her offending remarks. Something tells me she doesn't mean it any more this time than last.
Her catalogue of insults is impressive: Jews, blacks, and the memory of the still-warm umpire John McSherry. Another time, she said, ``Only fruits wear earrings.''
All this makes Schott controversial, a euphemism for ignorant. But while she doesn't look nearly as good in lipstick and high heels, Schott, like Rodman, seems to me to be more pitiable than outrageous.
A lot of semi-run-of-the-mill stuff is passing for outrageous these days. There was a time when Michael Irvin's legal problems - and world-class arrogance - might have seemed truly shocking. But that was many years and coke casualties ago.
Recently, Irvin was joined in the snow-capped headlines by Butch Hobson and Lawrence Taylor. With a few exceptions, no athlete has done more than Taylor to make the outrageous story seem routine.
After he was busted the other day for allegedly buying crack cocaine in Myrtle Beach, Taylor posted bond and went directly to a memorabilia show to sign autographs.
Once at the show, do you think Taylor was reproached by angry citizens?
Did the toadies at this autograph greedfest refuse to do business with someone with a history of drug abuse who had come straight from the jail house?
Did the man and woman on the street use the occasion to express outrage?
Sure. And Kathie Lee Gifford runs a day-care center in Honduras.
Excessive exposure over the years to a procession of weirdos, gasbags and druggies will numb anyone to the outrageous. It will numb an entire country. Which is why Rodman must constantly update his grotesque routine.
I've got to confess, outrage is a long reach for me. Bemused is about as far as I can go these days. by CNB