THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1996, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Monday, May 20, 1996 TAG: 9605180051
SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E2 EDITION: FINAL
TYPE: Column
SOURCE: Larry Bonko
LENGTH: Medium: 73 lines
NOBODY ASKED me but . . .
The producers of ``Murphy Brown'' must think we're fools. Do they expect us to believe that Miles would quit ``FYI,'' pack off to a big network job in New York and leave his lovely, leggy wife, Corky, behind? It happens in tonight's season finale when Grant Shaud (Miles) departs the series.
You're not really a ``Baywatch'' fan unless you have a David Hasselhoff CD. Yes, he sings.
I must be sci-fi ignorant because I consider Comedy Central's ``Mystery Science Theater 3000'' a waste of time. (If you don't, catch the reruns on WPEN Sundays at midnight).
Now that WVEC anchorman Jim Kincaid is about to retire, the title of folksiest local TV personality passes to Channel 13 weather guy Jeff Lawson.
It takes a lot of guts for 7-Eleven to spoof itself about high prices and stores as cheerful as mine shafts in the ``we've made so many changes, it's not even funny'' commercials.
WAVY weather reporter Don Slater proved the other night that anything goes during the May sweeps when he showed tape of a four-leggged chicken! The chicken had nothing whatsoever to do with forecasting, unless it came from a weather vane.
The most overreported story on local TV news last week was the fact there are only 7,000 parking spaces at the new Virginia Beach Amphitheater, built to hold 20,000 concert-goers.
I've got to get a life. I spent an entire hour listening to Ricki Lake's guests discuss this subject: ``My sister is a lazy slob.''
I don't care if her character on ``Chicago Hope'' is a brilliant doctor who can do open-heart surgery with one hand tied behind her back, Christine Lahti as Kate Austin annoys me no end. In tonight's season finale on CBS, her ex-husband pops up with an offer to buy the hospital.
If I were hired to keep track of the bouncing balls on the Virginia Lottery telecasts, the first thing I'do do is find a good manicurist.
Baseball fans have been quick to forgive the greedy owners and players who sabotaged the last two seasons. ESPN's ratings for ``Major League Baseball'' are up 20 percent this year. I'll boycott the telecasts until a labor agreement is signed.
I can guarantee you a day when trash-talk daytime TV will be respectable. That's June 21, the fourth annual Day of Compassion. Programming will be devoted to AIDs that day.
I can't make up my mind which is a bigger mouthful. Is it ``News Channel 3 News at 11 in Norfolk''? Or ``News Channel 6 News at 11 in Richmond''?
I totally hated Paul Reiser's performance on ``Mad About You'' on NBC last night. His character gave his wife, Jamie, a hard time for kissing a co-worker but he never ackowledged his flirtations. The season finale ended with them making up as he said, ``I'm not leaving you.'' Good riddance, I say.
If the producers' first choice, Jean Stapleton, had agreed to star in ``Murder, She Wrote,'' I doubt the series would have lasted 12 years. It closed up shop last night on CBS.
If you will admit it, so will I. ``Savannah'' on Warner Brothers is one of my guilty pleasures.
I am not alone in fretting about germs in our midst since I saw Lisa Joyner's expose (``Invisible Invaders``) on WAVY. Among the Infoline callers who repsonded, Leslie Baxter of Virginia Beach said, ``I feel I should be walking around wrapped in plastic.''
If you are like Mary Barco of Chesapeake, a Dana Carvey fan (``he's so creative'') who was upset because ABC took his show off in May, you should not despair. Carvey may return. ABC announces its fall schedule this week. MEMO: You can reach out and touch me by calling Infoline 640-5555, Category
3333.
by CNB