THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1996, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Saturday, September 21, 1996 TAG: 9609210237
SECTION: FRONT PAGE: A1 EDITION: FINAL
SOURCE: BY JUNE ARNEY, STAFF WRITER
DATELINE: CHESAPEAKE LENGTH: 115 lines
Six months after her firefighter husband and his partner died in the line of duty, Allison Hudgins is training to become a volunteer firefighter.
The 30-year-old widow says it's a way for her to get closer to her husband, John R. Hudgins Jr., who, along with fellow firefighter Frank E. Young, died in an auto parts store fire on March 18.
``It's not that I want to do anything heroic,'' she said. ``All I want to do is see what he did. Get in there and look in the face of a fire. I want to see why people want to go into a fire while everyone else is so desperately trying to get out. . . . I want to see why he found it so fascinating.''
``I want to know what he was feeling,'' she said.
Carole Victorio, Frank Young's mother, nodded in agreement as Hudgins explained her motivations.
``If I was younger, I think I'd do the same thing,'' said the 59-year-old woman whose son perished alongside Allison Hudgins' husband.
Allison Hudgins is also earning her master's degree in dental hygiene from Old Dominion University in addition to caring for her two sons, Joshua, 3 months, and Jordan, 4.
As the two women talked recently at Hudgins' home, little Jordan zoomed bright red fire trucks in circles across the carpet on the living room floor. Joshua drank from a bottle while cradled in his mother's arms.
A scanner programmed to the Chesapeake Fire Department channel chattered in the background. Hudgins takes comfort in the familiar voices. ``I just like listening to them,'' she said.
Hudgins started training about a month ago. She is undergoing classroom training, to be followed by hands-on practice on trucks and equipment. By November, she will practice fighting fires in controlled settings. In February she plans to take the state test.
Hudgins began learning some of the nuances of firefighting and the equipment used by firefighters during her frequent visits to the fire station to bring her husband meals. She'd ask him questions, and he would explain.
She is still coping with her loss and often dissolves in tears when she talks about her husband.
``The hardest part is the day after day after day of loneliness,'' she said, tears streaming down her cheeks. ``John and I had such a sweet relationship, and I don't think I'll have that again any time soon.''
She wiped her tears with the corner of a blanket wrapped around baby Joshua. Then she smiled.
``He always put me first,'' she said. ``I was lucky to have it as long as I did, because most people don't experience that kind of cherished love . . .''
John Hudgins is very much present in the room, in the wedding pictures and the awards displayed on the walls and tables. And in the words etched inside the wedding ring Allison Hudgins still wears: ``You are my life.''
``He knew what I was thinking before I said it,'' she said. ``There's not anybody to be on that same wave length with. . . . It's just lonely.''
Victorio, who lost her son to the fire, also knows about emptiness. She misses his voice, his sense of humor.
``The hardest part is the way he died,'' she said. ``That picture goes through my head every day.''
Her grandson, Steven, 18, now volunteers with the Chesapeake department and hopes to earn a permanent job either there or in another area department.
Compounding the women's loss is the ever-present swirl of controversy and media attention given the fatal fire and the Chesapeake department. The women take offense to some of it. But they also are anxious for more details.
And they can't help but wonder, what if . . .
``I know Johnny,'' his widow said. ``I know that he was desperately on the mike every time he could be to get some help. Maybe if the communications had been different, we could have a different result.''
Victorio shares that sentiment.
``There's only one word to describe that system, and that's antiquated,'' she said. ``I just think this is the time to hit the city up.''
She thinks that if there had been adequate backup, there would have been more eyes to spot trouble before it cost them their lives, she said.
``I'm not blaming Chief (Michael L.) Bolac for the deaths, because there were a whole lot of things that happened that day, but certainly the policies involved need to be changed,'' Victorio said.
The state's division of Occupational Safety and Health Administration recently cited the department for three violations:
Not following standards that require at least two backup firefighters to stand by when a two-man team enters a building.
Having a broken water gauge on the pumper truck.
Having a faulty fire plan for the shopping center where the store was located.
State officials said the combination of the three contributed to the deadly situation.
Following the state findings, Bolac responded that ``a very intense investigation found that none of these things caused the fire.''
``He's saying things that are very upsetting,'' Victorio said. ``There were mistakes made. He's saying they weren't a cause. Even (investigators are) saying that taken together, they were a cause. . . . People who know, are saying that Bolac isn't telling the whole story.''
Both women want to see something good come of the pain and loss they and the department have suffered. They would like to see more firefighters, a better communication system, whatever it takes to make the job safer.
``Basically, we don't want it to happen again,'' Victorio said. ILLUSTRATION: MIKE HEFFNER\The Virginian Pilot
Allison Hudgins is attending training classes to become a Chesapeake
volunteer firefighter six months after her husband died in a fire.
By November, she will practice fighting fires in controlled
settings. ``. . . I want to see why people want to go into a fire
while everyone else is so desperately trying to get out. . . . I
want to see why he found it so fascinating,'' she said.
Color photo by MIKE HEFFNER/The Virginian-Pilot
On March 18, Chesapeake firefighters John R. Hudgins Jr. and Frank
E. Young died in a fire. Now Allison Hudgins, holding her son
Joshua, is training to be a firefighter to get closer to her
husband and to ``see what he did. Get in there and look in the face
of a fire.''
Photo
John R. Hudgins Jr.
KEYWORDS: ACCIDENT CHESAPEAKE FIRE DEPARTMENT FIRE
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